“Would you like to conserve water? We should shower together!”
“Speaking of foreign policy, I have an erection.”
“After a few drinks, you totally don’t look busted anymore.”
“It’s 3 a.m.; I must be lonely.” – Matchbox Twenty
“Guess what! I just learned how to use a condom! Wanna try it out with me?”
“I’ve had a hard on for three weeks straight.”
“I need a tip drill.” – Nelly
“I’ve been reading Moby Dick, a story about a sperm whale and some seamen.”
“Can you measure something for me?”
“I’m in intensive care because someone tried to mount me. Now I know why they call it ‘Brokeback Mountain.’”
“I’m having trouble taking off my pants. Can you help?”
“You know who really turns me on? Sue Johansen!”
“Can you help me ‘rub one out’ before Bush’s speech?”
“I am so turned on by chicks with three nipples!”
“Chicks with four chins are hot!”
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