Playoff pick
A half-year from now, I'll refer to this Wespeak when the Rockies make the playoffs and say, "I told you ...
Editor’s Picks
Colour-Me Usdan floor plan
It gives me great pleasure, as the assitant to the deputy manager of Auxiliary Services of Wesleyan University, to release ...
Wanted: Blimp
Due to serious cinematic interest, a 3,000 ft. blimp is deeply desired to recreate Indiana Jones’ escape from the Nazis ...
Acrostic
Mocon will soon be destroyed. I want to burn down Summerfields. Cunt club is a waste of student fees. Hall-Atwater ...
Fruit rape
I am writing to you on behalf of WesFruity! (Wesleyan Fruit Rescue Urgently Immediately Today, Yes!) We were gravely offended ...
Open letter w/ a knife
You guys suck. Wesleyan was so much better when it was a white, all-male, conservative Methodist institution bent on maintaining ...
Good thymes
I'm writing to complain. Last week, I submitted a Wespeak to the Argus. This Wespeak was very dear to my ...
Reform financial aid: eliminate loans
To Whom it May Concern in the Wesleyan Community: I write to bring to your attention the recent decision of ...
Library hours are a nuisance
Right now, I am sitting in the kitchen of my rather small apartment unit on Court Street, wondering how I ...
“Do it in the Dark” round one results
Hey seniors. The first round of results for the Do it In the Dark competition is in. Remember, whichever house ...