Dear neighbors in Low/LoRise D1,
The Internet tells me that water borne toilets have existed since the days of the Harrapa civilization over 45 centuries ago. This invention has become a fixture in modern civilization and Wesleyan University too. Yet, you and your party guests have found it found it necessary on several occasions to piss on our front door and walls. Earlier tonight, my housemate Rob Boyd ’08 opened the door only to find that his foot was being pissed on by one of your buddies. Despite what your bros might tell you, this was not wicked-awesome-dude.
The facebook tells me that you guys are into sports, hanging out, partying, and relaxing with your crew. Assuredly, I am impressed that you guys can accomplish all of this and still find the time to urinate on us. But I’m asking that you quit it.
Love,
Alan in D2
PS: Rob isn’t too peeved about the foot thing, but I get a little angry when neighbors throw their weight around acting like assholes. Marvin Gaye and Dispatch would not approve…
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