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Please put away the damn laptop

Dear student sitting next to me in class,

Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t really understand why you need a laptop for this, or any class. I mean, I also would like to spend the class on facebook, checking my email and IMing. And actually, I can experience this vicariously just by looking over your shoulder. And sometimes I shut my eyes and just listen to your constant typing, imagining the updated profiles and new email awaiting me.

But, my friend, you are a tease. See, I don’t like three-hour classes either, but you know, I respect my peers and professors and their quest for knowledge more than your quest for a lunch date. So I guess what I’m saying is please stop. No, seriously, you are wasting your own time as well as mine. And if this is a problem, you can facebook message me.

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