As a graduating senior, you will be required to agree to the terms of the apartment lottery before forming a group of 2-4 cynical yet idealistic liberal-arts-diploma-wielding tools. Preference for the Williamsburg Dorms will be given to Film Studies and Studio Art majors, trust-fund kids, and anyone with a band that incorporates a hooky pop aesthetic while staying true to its DIY roots. Off-Borough status will be granted on a limited basis to those wishing to opt for the San Francisco, Washington, DC or “assuaging white guilt in a foreign country” lotteries.
Before room selection, you will be required to attend a Community Standards workshop. Any group with all members on time and accounted for will be placed in their parent’s basements or something, because obeying authority is for fucking losers. However, we ask that you do keep a few standards in mind. Noise should remain appropriate at all times. May we at ResLife suggest the new LCD Soundsystem? Also, keep irony at acceptable levels. Your RA will hold a meeting to decide on Gwen Stefani-free hours for your building. No pets or CSS majors, except on Coney Island.
We wish you the best in your 1 to 3 year post-graduate freelance project phase. If you have any questions about the 2015 Westchester Suburban Home Selection process, feel free to contact us.
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