You’re Welcome

Wesleyan students were thanked recently for their aid in the Wesleyan Campaign, a shady money-laundering program run by unsavory back-room wheeler-dealers supporting progress and book-cooking across the Wesleyan campus. A weird email sent to the Wesleyan community included a link to a sappy, creepy video accompanied by Wesleyan’s signature off-key bells playing the fight song on a loop. So, to you noble money-lenders, we broke-ass Wesleyan students say “you’re welcome.” We sure as hell didn’t contribute— but thanks for thanking us. It was nice.