At this point we are all aware of the omnipresence of The Facebook. That much is clear. There are those that support it, those that hate it, those that are embarrassed by it, and then there are those that are for lack of a better term, overwhelmed, by the web community.
My dear friends Anthony and Alex have demonstrated their usual witty rhetoric to assert the dehumanizing effect that The Facebook has had on fleshy peer-to-peer interaction (but doesn’t flesh just lead to objectification?)
Now, every person is allowed their opinion, but clouded behind this jumble of parentheses, strange metaphors and an undeniable disrespect for the high action and magical allure of LARP?ing is a lie. And clearly the American public, and me as their humble vessel, won?t take that sitting down!
The opportunities for immersion in The Facebook are nearly endless: from groups, to friends, to high school girls it is easy to lose oneself in the myriad. I know for a fact that my friends have. As a freshman oh-so-many of my nights were spent falling asleep to the ethereal glow of Anthony Nikolchev perusing his illegitimate love-child The Pyronecrobestiality Role Playing Society, breathing heavily as he lured hapless innocents into his cult-like union. And Alex Gelman is no more guiltless, his obsessions border on crimes against humanity, some so heinous that I won’t repeat them here. What I can say is that they mostly have to do with finding more pictures of that girl that took her shirt off on collegehumor.com (we’re all jealous #14), Photoshop and sea gulls. Now many may be saddened, humored or even disgusted by these revelations. But truly, obsession is a facet of life.
Anthony and Alex make valid points. The Facebook is kind of like a child molester. Sort of. Not really. Child molesters are creepy and registered. The Facebook is just a registered copyright.
The reality is, is that as with everything in life moderation is the key. The path that Anthony and Alex preach, signing off, is really just an attempt by the liberal elite to further perpetuate the growth of Anti-American values and destabilize morality. And we all know how closely morality is tied to puppies. So by the transitive property we find that these guys want to kill puppies. We are then forced to choose a lesser of two evils: addiction or dead puppies. And Anthony and Alex would have you leave it at that.
If the two of them had any self control they would know that it’s not only possible, but easy, to balance Facebook life and real life. It’s a website, its fun, but it doesn’t deserve this much attention. Evan Carp does. Basically what I want to say is, Grow!
Up.
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