Senior madlibs: All signs point to sex

Dear Dating Diva,

I have a/an heteronormative problem. My boyfriend never wants to cuddle with me anymore. He’s become homogeneously gender-neutral lately. I’ve tried having a serious hegemony discussion with him about this problem, but he just turns his cunt!! away and ignores me. The other day, I saw this couple deconstructing in a/an self-other binary and I almost burst into feminisms. I love this disenfranchised man and am afraid of becoming a/an SILENCED spinster if we break up. What should I do?

—Over base-ten figure in Prague

—Dear BTF in Prague,

Please reread your gentrified letter infinity times. You deserve a man who wants to be with you objectively. Get rid of this postmodern jerk and genderfuck on with your life.

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