Dear WestCo,
As a feline guest in your courtyard, I appreciate your handouts and numerous attempts at frolicking with me and other WeStray cats. However, I have a complaint: BBQ seitan is not cat food. In fact, I’ve heard you can’t even digest it if you’re not white and wearing hemp at the time of ingestion. Please, leave the vegan café leftovers at the campus center for those skanky flies on the first floor. Additionally, a good number of you realized that cow’s milk, though tasty, gives kitties the runs. However, so does Silk soy milk, and if you think your hallmate who shat through her Tuesday classes ’cause of gastroenteritis had it bad, wait until you see the mess in back of down 4.
Thanks,
Oliver and Co.
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