You guys don’t read this bullshit anyway, do you? How many of you really don’t know how to write Wespeaks at this point? I mean, with the frequency some of you assholes write in, you’d think argus@wesleyan.edu was the e-mail address of your personal diary or something. Also, stop sending unsolicited articles, asshats.
Have y’all seen Trapped in the Closet parts 6-10? I haven’t caught it on Vh1 yet, so I’m still waiting. I hear there’s a midget!!!! How fucked up is that?
I think we can all agree that America’s Next Top Model has gotten really weird lately. I mean, kicking Lisa off before Jayla? And let’s not even get into our girl Kim. I mean I, know some of you weren’t rooting for he—maybe that means you’re homophobic? or latently gay—but she’s our hometown girl and we have to support her. That Birth of Venus thing was bullshit though. We all know Nicole should have done that and Kim should have been Girl with a Pearl Earring. God, why do I know so much more than Tyra Banks? I blow my own mind sometimes.
And thats when I start goin crazy like I was tryin to give her a baby. The room feel like its spinnin. We keep turnin and turnin as if we were in a whirlwind, the way our toes are curlin. The next thing ya know, she starts goin real wild, and starts screamin my name. Then I asid baby, we must slow down before I bust a vessel in my brain. And she said please no don’t stop. And I said I caught a cramp. And she said please keep on goin. I said my leg is about to crack. And then she calls out oh my goodness, I’m about to climax. And I said cool climax, just let go of my leg. She says you’re the perfect lover, I said I can’t go no further, then I flip back the cover… OH MY GOD, A RUBBER.
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