Once again winter has come to New England and taken its toll on Wesleyan University. Like many students on this campus, winter makes me both sad and angry simultaneously. However dreary the winter might make me, I know there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. And that light is approaching real fast.
The light that I speak of is the Super Bowl, the greatest invention this side of the wheel. It is the culmination of not only the professional football season, but also a time that brings out the best in people. A time that men can stand together as one, united only in their intense hatred of the New England Patriots while willing them on to bitter, agonizing defeat. An entire country can rally around that little team from Carolina, the Panthers; the team that would never stay down, the team that even when it looked like the mountain was just too damn high, they dug deep within their souls and did whatever it took to win, even if that meant resorting to cannibalism. The Super Bowl is upon us, my fellow football fanatics, and it is our duty to do everything in our power to make it as good as possible, because the day after, winter will once again stick its ugly head out and make all our lives miserable.
Sadly, the truth about the Super Bowl is that for all the hype and glitter that surrounds the game, the actual game itself is usually pretty terrible. I’d say that one out of every three Super Bowls is actually a decent game and seeing how there was an excellent game two years ago and an awful one last year, the odds just don’t look good for this year’s effort. When you throw in the teams that are playing in the game, two teams that pride themselves on stout defenses and the concept of playing as a team (read: there are no high profile players in this game), the enjoyment level might be at an all time low. Right now I find myself in a strange predicament: I should be excited about the Super Bowl, yet somehow, deep down in my subconscious I’m scared to put too much effort into the game lest it be a terrible one. With that in mind, my attention will go to something that will make the Super Bowl experience enjoyable no matter what the outcome of the game: throwing a nasty Super Bowl party. If you are in the same situation as me, you might find these little party hints informative and helpful.
FOOD
There really is no rule etched in stone concerning what food to have at a party. Of course there are the old standbys: pizza, wings, pretzels, other finger foods. I like things that you can throw at the TV when something goes wrong, without having to worry about damaging it. Popcorn is great for that and it is not that hard to clean up. One thing that should not be forgotten is the importance of a good dip. Even if the game is awful and your party is lackluster, if you have a good dip, you’re money. For some strange reason, people always remember a good dip. I don’t know if anyone has ever come up with an explanation for that. It’s like those giant head statues on Easter Island.
BEVERAGES
(All of you readers that are under 21 should skip down to the next section)
Without question this is the area where most Super Bowl parties mess up. Everyone has this idea that having a keg guarantees a great party. I have one word for that: wrong. A keg is the most overrated aspect of a party. They hold lots of beer, that is the only positive I can think of. The negatives are plentiful. The Super Bowl is on a Sunday; no liquor stores are open. That means you need to buy it the night before. Refrain from tapping it that night; store it in a cold place until the following evening. Then during the game, you need to have it somewhere that is easily accessible, yet does not take up valuable seating space.
Cups present a problem as well. A cup is a dangerous thing when there are a lot of people around cheering, slapping hands, flailing limbs. It is a disaster waiting to happen. And one thing I’m sure of is that people don’t want to be cleaning up spilt beer while a good game is going on. Finally, what happens if you don’t finish all that beer? In the end, you’re going to be stuck with warm, flat, skunky beer. The easy solution is stock up on cheap, domestic beer before, put it in the fridge and tell people that they may imbibe freely.
Also, you are going to want some beverages with some caffeine in them. People forget that the Super Bowl is a long game and when halftime rolls around, there is no shame in having yourself a Pepsi, Coke, or Dr. Pepper just to ensure that you are still going strong even after the game is over.
These are only some aspects of a good Super Bowl party, grab Friday’s edition for the rest.
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