Editors’ Note: The Argus editorial staff would like to apologize for the publication of the opinion piece titled “Wesleyan v. Wellesley: ‘Rather Dead than Coed?’” on Tuesday, Oct. 11. We failed to uphold our duty to ensure that articles, op-eds or otherwise, do not unfairly target individuals or groups. Many of the author’s assertions in this piece were unfounded, and we apologize to those who were hurt or offended by them.

The article has been taken down from the Argus website and replaced by a statement from the author.


Author response posted 10/19 2:05 p.m.

Dear Readers,

I would first like to say that, like any opinion piece published in The Argus, “Wesleyan v. Wellesley: ‘Rather Dead than Coed?’” does not reflect the views of the general student body at Wesleyan or the newspaper’s staff. I apologize to the University for causing unnecessary animosity between liberal arts institutions.

I sincerely regret the generalizations I made in this piece and apologize to students and alumni of women’s colleges who do not share these experiences. My intention for the article was to showcase some of the stereotypes I encountered as a student during my first two years at Bryn Mawr and to explain why a women’s college was not right for me.

Additionally, Wellesley is mentioned in the title of the article because the two schools are often confused with each other due to their similarity in nomenclature. However, I did not intend to extend this comparison to the broader experiences of attending a single-sex and co-ed education.  I did not aim to incite a debate over which school is “better,” nor did I intend to attack any specific institution.

While I should not have generalized beyond my own experiences, these assertions were based on incidents that I witnessed during my time at Bryn Mawr.

The bigger issue for me was how men viewed Bryn Mawr women as a result of our single-sex experience. What initially appeared to be quirks that were not necessarily representative of the majority of Bryn Mawr students nevertheless become a starting point for Haverford and Swarthmore students to ridicule us.  We were looked down upon for our lower liberal arts college ranking and mocked for wanting to study at their institutions.  At Bryn Mawr, my fellow hallmates were harangued by a female Swarthmore student at a party (“You don’t go here, do you? Oh, let me guess—Bryn Mawr!”).  I was told by another male student that he intended to take a class at Bryn Mawr “because it was an easy A.”  It was through degrading experiences like these that were imposed on Bryn Mawr as a result of reinforced stereotypes that I came to believe the self-segregation of women’s colleges had backfired.

The majority of commenters on this article are alumni and students and women’s colleges who adamantly assert that no such incidents occur at their institutions. Perhaps I was one of an unfortunate few at Bryn Mawr to witness events like this on a regular basis. However, many of my classmates at the time told me they also felt marginalized by the experience of attending an all-girls school, and I know many who transferred as well.

I do not dispute anyone’s satisfaction or happiness with her single-sex college experience. If my description contradicts your women’s college experience, I can only say I am envious.  I intended to highlight a side of the women’s college experience that is less often portrayed. These negative stereotypes do exist and continue to be perpetuated and  I condemn them as much as any commenter.

I came to Wesleyan because it was a good fit for me.  I remain confident that I would have received a similarly exceptional education had I graduated from Bryn Mawr; the only change is that I am finally satisfied with my college experience.

I am glad this issue has brought about a public discussion, and have learned a lot from this experience as well. Again, I apologize for the generalizations made in my original piece, but I continue to stand by my opinion about same-sex education and invite readers to critique my arguments, not my personal character.

  • wow

    you guys are really fucking vicious

  • Ashley Gavin, BMC ’10

    Hi Vicky,
    You are probably not interested in anyone’s comments here relating to the benefits of a women’s college; you’ve already made your opinion quite clear. And I am not going to bore you with my perspective as a Bryn Mawr alum now working as a software engineer at MIT’s national security research lab, which you can imagine is quite male dominated. Rather I am going to address the fact that you chose to bash an entire community of people online. Literally hundreds of thousands of women have found women’s colleges to be extremely relevant for literally hundreds of years.

    And you, Vicky Chu, you spent 1 year at Bryn Mawr.

    Its fine that you didn’t like it. I don’t think anyone cares that you didn’t like it. People care that you attempted to demolish the reputations of these schools on the internet, with no real evidence other than your anecdotes. Did you really learn so little at Bryn Mawr that you’re ignorant enough to post sweeping statements about large groups of people online, with no evidence to back it up?

    Also, with all your talk about how obsessive Bryn Mawr women about bringing down the patriarchy, and the embracing the sisterhood, or whatever, did you not predict that we would be ALL OVER THIS SHIT?!

  • Anna Gibertini, BMC’13

    I wouldn’t worry too much, Ms. Chu. I mean, you’ve definitely managed to humiliate yourself, your institution, and your peers, but you haven’t completely shot yourself in the foot yet (unfortunately for the rest of the world). I’m sure you can find a nice job in the future at Fox News. Your internalized misogyny, lack of writing skills, and general idiocy are exactly what they are looking for.

    In the mean time, have fun at Wesleyan and we at Bryn Mawr and Wellesley will continue to throw our tampons on the floor. Because you know — that’s just WE DO at women’s colleges.

  • Horsegirlburg

    For a college that is so sheltered from men I feel like I see quite a few male Swarthmore and Haverford students walking around, not to mention the male post-bacs and graduate students who actually attend BMC. Weird…

    RR, BMC ’13

  • Hannah Laue

    As another transfer from Bryn Mawr, I clearly had my issues with the school. However, I understand that this was not the college’s fault, but a difference of personality fit. Like you, I used to scoff at people who corrected “all girl’s school” to “all women’s college” until I got out in the real world and had people question my abilities simply because I was a female. I am truly sorry and sympathetic that you had such a negative experience at Bryn Mawr, but I hope in the future you learn to approach this subject with enough maturity to not be hostile to the institution and all women’s education all together. Respect for others and their needs is one of the lessons you missed in your time there and I wish you the best of luck as you learn it now.

  • Katrous

    I have clicked ‘like’ on very many of the comments below, but I really must reiterate: what foolish editor allowed such an ill-advised opinion piece to be posted? Could anyone really have thought it would garner praise for the writer OR the school? (M Lavrakas BMC ’88)

    • er..

      Have you considered that the purpose of an opinion piece doesn’t have to be for the purpose of “garnering praise”? But rather to express an opinion that sometimes the author knows will not be popular?

      • Katrous

        This is what is known as a Public Relations FAIL. At my workplace, no blog post/opinion piece that goes out under the University’s imprint would ever go live without passing by the eyes of the communications department. You know, to make sure that some person doesn’t accidentally cause a firestorm based on poorly presented feelings that do not reflect the school’s message or attitudes.

      • Katrous

        Although, to clarify, I’m not including solely student produced publications in that assessment. I have zero idea what sort of oversight they have on our campus, although I do recall officials and readers occasionally reacting vehemently to poorly conceived/executed pieces attacking our main sports rivals…

  • SM WC08

    Holy Shades of Community, Batman!

    Ms. Chu, I personally had a horrible social experience at Wellesley. I was not the norm. Most people had a great time. Since leaving I’ve realized college is not, ultimately, about socializing. You go to school to go to school. I got a great education. I do not regret it.

    Women’s college alums, I share your outrage. Now leave it alone. Someone publishes one of these every other year. Don’t make it worse by writing something that will embarrass you (threats, etc.) or reflect poorly on your college.

    SM, Wellesley ’08

  • Procrastinating~

    As a Bryn Mawr student, I personally really enjoy having a holiday where I frolic around in white and scream “DEATH TO THE PATRIARCHY”. Just saying~

    F.L. BMC ’14

  • I transferred TO Bryn Mawr

    You must be very insecure in your femininity. I wish you had had some valid arguments against Bryn Mawr so I could refute them, but you don’t.

    Also, it took me to the very last sentence of your article to realize you actually weren’t kidding. Yikes.

  • Anonymous

    I’m sorry, hold on. You read this an opinion piece? Are you sure we’re referring to the same article? Vicky used exaggerated personal anecdotes and applied them across the board as if they were facts of ALL women’s colleges in general. Aside from most of the claims she makes about Bryn Mawr in this article being founded in utter and complete falsehood, she did NOT present this article as an opinion piece. The claims she uses to substantiate her “opinion”, dare I call it that, are false, disgusting, and horribly offensive.

    In response to your comment about Wellesley women riding “the fuck truck” to neighboring institutions: I assure you that term is not used by a single Wellesley student. Rather, I hypothesize that demeaning term was coined by students at other institutions that harbor misguided resentment towards Wellesley women that have decided to seek out social events at their schools*.

    Is it likely that women from Wellesley occasionally engage in sexual or romantic activity with students from those schools? I’m inclined to say yes. Perhaps it’s because I’m unfamiliar with the nature of Wesleyan’s social life but I’m assuming those kinds of interactions occur just as frequently at your school as they do at any other college, all-women’s college or not. I will not defend the actions of any student at Bryn Mawr, Wellesley, or any other all women’s institution that shares an academic or social relationship with their neighboring schools because THESE ACTIONS DO NOT NEED DEFENDING. Attending an all women’s college does not commit me to celibacy nor does it restrict who I can or cannot be friends with, sleep with, party with, etc. I’m sorry that going to an all women’s college means I can’t just walk down the hall to watch a movie with or sex up my boyfriend/girlfriend. I think it’s really unfortunate that you seem to think that having to ride a bus in order to do that gives anyone the right to look at and refer to me in a derogatory manner.

    The fact that you even used the “Fuck Truck” as an example of why women’s colleges could never “survive” without their hypothetical coed counterparts only improves upon arguments echoed by others in this thread in favor of attending an all-women’s institution. Fuck truck? Yea, Vicky… I’m gonna’ say it. Death to the patriarchy! DEATH to the fucking patriarchy. How dare anyone condemn a woman for how she chooses to use her mind OR her body. Your use of the term “fuck truck” only reinforces the ever-present dichotomy between how men and women’s actions are perceived in current social and political realms.

    While I agree that some of the responses to Vicky’s article are unnecessarily aggressive and spiteful, the criticism of what she has presented in this piece is most definitely warranted. Your attempt to defend her is noble, however, your own misguided and offensive response further proves that.

    *Disclaimer: I’m a student at Bryn Mawr so this statement was simply a projection of how I feel some Haverford and Swarthmore students view Bryn Mawr students “invading” their campus on the weekend. I am unfamiliar with the nature of the Wellesley/Harvard/MIT relationship.

    • I am fairly certain that it is Vicky who was attempting to defend herself, and not a friend. She first heard the phrase “fuck truck” while still at Bryn Mawr, as it was used to describe the tri co van.

      • Bostonstudent

        Hahaha. Believe me, it’s probably not commonly known at Wellesley, but it’s commonly known at MIT and Harvard. We alternate between fuck truck and Slut Bus, and I guess Haverford/Bryn Mawr has caught on!

      • SM WC08

        Bostonstudent … Wellesley knows. Thanks for proving that sexism is alive and well. Have fun perpetuating it!

  • Anonymous

    Well, it’s your loss that you’d choose a place like Wesleyan over Bryn Mawr. Going to Bryn Mawr does not mean all of that stereotypical trash that you spewed in this “article”. It means being a part of the most welcoming community you’ll ever be lucky enough to find, being challenged every day in your classes, being surrounded by brilliant professors and classmates, embracing incredible traditions, finding closer friendships than you could find anywhere else… need I go on? Bryn Mawr is the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and I think you’ll find many Mawrtyrs who will say the same. And we’ll defend our school until our dying day- notice how many comments this piece of trash has gotten?

    Also, saying “women’s colleges could not seem to function independently of coeducation institutions” is just plain HILARIOUS. I know in my department, the corresponding departments in the other two schools in the tri-co lean QUITE heavily upon their Bryn Mawr counterpart, which is known for being one of the best in the nation. Bryn Mawr is quite proud to stand on its own in every way. Maybe YOU needed the other schools, but other Mawrtyrs certainly don’t.

    Wesleyan should be ashamed for publishing such an article. I happen to find Wesleyan repulsive, but you don’t see me posting offensive, stereotype-ridden articles in the Bi-Co News, do you?

    Here’s hoping you have lots of unhappy Fridays and beyond <3 D to the P!

  • EmbarrassedMawrtyr

    As a recent graduate of Bryn Mawr College, I am embarrassed by the vitriol of the responses to this article. Yes, Ms. Chu makes a number of dubious claims about the school, claims that misrepresent the experiences of the vast majority of its students. But a little perspective could go a long way. So a college student wrote an opinion piece for a school newspaper that you thought was unfair. Get over it.

    Responding to a poorly reasoned argument with hundreds of declarations of anonymous slander is probably not the best way to convince people that Bryn Mawr is actually a great place. If these petty, condescending rants are indeed an accurate representation of the Bryn Mawr student body, then I imagine the Ms. Chu must feel pretty good about her decision to leave.

    In conclusion, lighten up Bryn Mawr. I thought we were better than this. Let’s have a little sense of humor about ourselves and keep in mind the immortal words of one Dr. Bob Kelso:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=USh8lKeui2o#t=24s

    • Bryn Mawr ’13

      I am a current Bryn Mawr student who definitely finds this article offensive. Ms. Chu chose to use her less than stellar experiences at one all women’s college to attack a whole slew of highly educated and highly motivated women, and attempts to belittle and slander every women’s college in the process. It is an arrogant assumption that all women’s colleges are a reflection of what she supposedly experienced.

      So, yeah, it’s a foolish opinion piece that isn’t grounded in anything substantial. I have to agree with EmbarrassedMawrtyr: Why are we attacking Ms. Chu? If this is an attempt to show people how smart and determined Bryn Mawr women are, we are definitely failing. While I have a lot of less than stellar things to say about Bryn Mawr, one of the things I have admired about my institution is my fellow students’ passion and courage. As a student body we are not afraid to press the envelope and use our passions to start dialogues. We challenge authority, we stand up for what we believe in, and we let our voices be heard. In my opinion, that’s not what you’ve done here.

      Attacking someone for their opinions? I really didn’t think that was what Bryn Mawr was all about. What could have been a constructive dialogue has turned into an all out war, and we (Bryn Mawr students) are left looking just as arrogant as we are painting Ms. Chu out to be.

      • Guest

        I don’t think attacking Ms. Chu is appropriate. Pointing out the flaws in both her argument and her methodology, as well as defending a way of life which, on some level, defines each woman who chooses it, is not out of line in the least. If you go through the comments, most of them try to dissect her arguments and disprove them, point by point.

        I do wish that Ms. Chu had afforded Bryn Mawr, its students, and women’s colleges at large the same respect for which you now campaign. I doubt she realized the vitriol with which the community would respond – or even that this article would leak out of the Wesleyan bubble. (Yes, Wesleyan… you’re in a bubble too.) In the shifting world of the Information Age, however, we must take care to remember that local action can have global consequences.

        I look forward to seeing the Argus retract this article and Ms. Chu issue an apology for her thoughtlessness. While I doubt this will ever really happen, I think it would do a lot to mend fences between Ms. Chu and her former school.

  • DtotheP14

    I offer in response:

    “I have known many graduates of Bryn Mawr. They are all of the same mold.
    They have all accepted the same bright challenge: something is lost that has not been found, something’s at stake that has not been won, something is started that has not been finished, something is dimly felt that has not been fully realized. They carry the distinguishing mark – the mark that separates them from other educated and superior women; the incredible vigor, the subtlety of mind, the warmth of the spirit, the aspiration, the fidelity to past and to present. As they grow in years, they grow in light. As their minds and hearts expand, their deeds become more formidable, their connections more significant … I once held a live hummingbird in my hand. I once married a Bryn Mawr girl. To a large extent they are twin experiences.”
    -E.B. White, Call Me Ishmael: Or How I Feel About Being Married to a Bryn Mawr Woman

    Go read the full essay, you might learn something. I wonder if Wesleyan students have ever inspired such a remarkable piece of writing…

    • anon

      oh god, please don’t bring the rest of us Wesleyan students into this… I am ashamed that Vicky is my own classmate!

  • 13′ McBride

    There are so many portions of your article that are offensive, it’s hard to know where to begin.

    So I’ll just say this … going to Bryn Mawr (like any single sex institution) is a very big decision. It is not for everyone, and clearly it was not for you. I wish your parents had provided better counsel when you were considering college choices. You might have avoided what sounds like a miserable year at Bryn Mawr and would have avoided embarrassing yourself. Your article is an obvious caricature of Bryn Mawr and I would guess that anyone with average maturity will recognize the limitations and generalizations of your article.

    I’d like to ask about your statement – “it really isn’t normal” – as compared to what exactly? The “real world” atmosphere at an academic institution? You are misguided if you believe the world which awaits you after graduation looks like anything Wesleyan.

    Perhaps you meant say it isn’t “normal” as compared to other colleges/universities. It might have not occurred to you, so I’d like to point out that each quality academic institution has a culture that makes it unique … which is the entire point. By standing out and sharing common, unique experience the student body is bonded for life – across generations and professions. This creates a powerful network and a base from which students can go on to exceptional lives and careers. Perhaps that is not “normal” – hooray!

  • BMC ’09

    Vicki,

    I presume that what inspired you to write this article is because it’s your senior year of college: a time when all students are thinking about where they’ve been, where they’re going, and how they’ve changed over the past four years. As a fellow transfer student — someone who transferred to Bryn Mawr from a co-ed liberal arts college — I’ve been in your shoes. There’s an impulse to interrogate where you started because it’s so different from where you are now.

    I’d certainly encourage you to continue reflecting on this idea, which you’ve clearly begun to do in writing this article. That being said, publicly attacking a community is in poor taste, especially when I’m confident that you’d have better insights to offer.

    In particular, your argument seems to be that a co-ed experience is definitively better than that offered by a women’s college. From my transfer experience, I learned that one is not better than another: they simply are different. And the beauty of having both options is that you have the opportunity to choose. As we experienced as transfer students, it’s about making the right choice the second time around.

    Maybe you’re reflecting on this topic because you’re disappointed that you only had three years at Wesleyan, not four. For a time, I felt that way. However, I came to realize that I wouldn’t be the person I am today if I had not transferred. That one year of misery at a co-ed college changed me just as much as three years at Bryn Mawr. I am equally grateful for what both experiences offered and for the opportunity to choose the best one for me.

    One day, I hope that you can look back on your college experience and be happy with your decisions and who you’ve become as a result of those choices. And that means dwelling on how grateful you are for Wesleyan, not your unresolved anger towards a place you chose you leave.

  • Bryn Mawr 2013

    If I remember correctly…didn’t you first want to go to Wellesley? And get rejected?

    Furthermore, you’re generalizing all of Bryn Mawr. Not all students here, quite frankly, give a fuck about gender inequality – like myself. Maybe if you had taken more time to get to know the students at Bryn Mawr rather than running off to parties at Swarthmore, you’d realize that there are a lot of us who think just like you here…who chose the school not because it was a women’s college, but because of other educational opportunities.

  • BMC-to-Co-ed Transfer

    Dear Ms. Chu,
    I, too, attended Bryn Mawr College for my freshman year before transferring to a co-ed school. Although I chalk up many of my past initial reactions to the school as a product of a conservative, Christian, Midwestern upbringing, they greatly resembled your own impressions. As in: knee-jerk, prejudicial, anecdotal, immature, and categorically unfair.
    As I read your piece, all I could think of was myself – at 19. Fresh from small-town Ohio. The inner narrative in my mind during that time went something like this: “LESBIANS! Women wearing SWEATPANTS! Where are the MEN?” Lest you get the wrong idea, however, let it be said I adored Bryn Mawr, with the same appreciation for the intellectual rigor and architectural beauty you oh-so-briefly-cited. With an addition to your weak plaudits – the amazing women I met and bonded with, including my Customs group and some who have commented on this article already.
    But I, like you, went off in search of the Great Wide Normal. A co-ed liberal arts school back home, to be precise. Wesleyan it ain’t. After glorying in the testosterone, sorority membership, and the “familiarity” of women in Ugg boots sporting fake tans (no sweatpants here, natch) I would like to testify from a post-grad perspective a few years ahead of your own that you have jumped from the frying pan into the fire.
    Bryn Mawr isn’t “normal.” It’s better. A utopia somewhat replicated within the intellectual confines of your institution, but never matched. You write that “there is still a Real World, and it’s been easier to learn how to contend with it and with men at Wesleyan than at a women’s college.” That is one argument with which I am inclined to agree. It is certainly easier to contend to the “Real World,” which you, Ms. Chu, have never experienced, if one does not attend an institution that champions women. Because if there is one thing the Real World doesn’t do, Ms. Chu, it’s that.
    Refusing to challenge the status quo (no “down with the patriarchy!” cries) avoiding casual dress (sweatpants) and steering away from anything concerned with women’s bodies, such as menstruation (bloody tampons) will certainly prepare you for this “Real World” you anticipate; you will have been sufficiently conditioned within societal norm to accept it. And when you confront the Real World in all of it’s bigoted, prejudicial, male-biased glory, you will think back to that “single-sex, isolated, bubble of women” you left…with longing. And maybe an understanding of what you lost when you made a trade in favor of Normal.

    • And those sweatpants-sporting individuals you left behind? If there is anything you should have learned at BMC, Ms. Chu, it is the ferocity and devotion of the Mawrtyr. I would compare throwing down the gauntlet as you have done to waving filet mignon in front of a pack of starving wolves. Enjoy.
      * Perhaps you spent too much time at Haverford?

  • HC

    Wow! There is no fight like a cat fight! I think we can safely conclude: Wellesley and Bryn Mawr = BITCHES. Proof: 200 Comments. Thanks for making Vicky’s case for her. She couldn’t have done it without you.

    • Seven Sisters Student

      I disagree that the volume of comments is somehow a response to some underlying truth in the author’s claims. True, there are quite a few comments that are mean-spirited, but there are also a number of rational comments pointing out her illogical extension of her (quite exaggerated) experience at Bryn Mawr to suddenly apply to every women’s college in the United States.

      The number of comments doesn’t make us bitches. The number of comments, from parents of current students, from alumnae from the 1960s, and even tangentially from Wesleyan students noting that the author doesn’t speak on behalf of her school, is more representative of our intent to respond, as we have for decades, to countless arguments that we don’t deserve to exist, that our institutions don’t have importance or meaning.

      As a student of a co-ed college (Haverford, I might assume from the HC? Or perhaps even Wesleyan?), I wouldn’t necessarily expect you to immediately think of the constant vitriol that results from attending a women’s college when reading these comments. Often when I mention my college choice to people from high school, I’m asked how lesbian sex is, or how desperate I’ve gotten for men as if I’m so horny I can’t get through the day. (I’m straight, and I don’t feel demeaned by being called gay, because I have met some of the most amazing people I know at college, and they are gay, trans, genderqueer, and more.) But co-ed students have the luxury of feeling secure in their institution without being questioned, as it has now been the societal norm for a very long time, and it’s something I envy. It took me a long time to come to a place where I was happy with where I was, and willing to accept the necessity of constantly being defensive.

      I think to Bryn Mawr students in particular, for a transfer student to write as if she is the voice of the community while having abandoned it is particularly repugnant. It is a betrayal of sorts. The Seven Sisters in particular have a notion of ‘sisterhood’ and support, and a large network of alumnae. I suppose it’s somewhat similar to the Wesleyan Mafia in film. To us, this is like a Wesleyan student graduating and getting involved with Wesleyan film alums, then turning around a year later and writing a crude ‘expose’ filled with lurid and manifestly untrue details.

      I hope this doesn’t come across as ‘bitchy’. When I first read the comments here, I was actually shocked at how polite and well thought out they are, considering this is an anonymous forum and anyone could post “LOL UR WRONG” if they so wished.

    • JP Reilly

      Only a man would refer to women speaking up above angelic tones as “bitches”. You proved her point. Men rule the world and women had better remember their place. And God bless poor Vivian, she drank that coolaid.

      • me too

        Make that Vicky. Maybe she’ll get lucky and other people will forget her name.

    • BMC ’86

      If expressing an opinion (most of them well structured, considered and polite) makes a woman a bitch then I have only this to say: then long live the Bryn Mawr and Wellesley “bitches.” Your comment reinforces why women still need single sex education: people who think that if a women speaks up, she is bitch.

  • The fact that disagreeing with someone’s assessment and making your own opinion known qualifies one as a “bitch” at Wesleyan is perhaps the best testament to the downside of both the real anti-feminist world and co-ed education I can think of

    • HC

      Not from Wes byoch, but thanks.

      • We’re all “bitches” but suddenly I am demoted to “byoch?” I am sad.

      • Molly Pieri, BMC Class ’09

        Kaley is one of the sweetest people you will ever meet. She also has the ability to break the “tyranny of nice and kind” (google it) that so many women lack. She knows that being an assertive woman is not the same as being a bitchy woman. She has the courage to sign her name to her opinions. So far, she has been far more of a credit to herself in this forum than many other participants, including those who call her “byoch” from the safety of an anonymous internet forum. She deserves better from you.

        -Molly Pieri, BMC ’09

      • Thanks Molly! I loved being one of your froshlings at BMC.

  • BMC ’11

    It’s OK, Vicky. You don’t need to be afraid of women.

    We can teach you how to learn to dance when the music’s ended.

    -D2tP

  • BMC2010

    My Mawrtyr sisters have said it all already. But just to add my voice to the chorus — shame on you and shame on the Argus editors for publishing this hateful and degrading article.

  • Ashley Hahn BMC’14

    I’m proud to be a Bryn Mawr woman! I can relate to her exaggerated feelings and thoughts about Bryn mawr since I briefly considered transferring last year, but that was because I didn’t give Bryn Mawr a true chance. When I took the time to actually get out there and see what Bryn Mawr has to offer, I was hooked. Bryn Mawr is an extraordinary place and anyone would be lucky enough to attend.

    I have a few responses.
    1) Maybe you should have stayed at Bryn Mawr because Bryn Mawr would have taught you acceptance, the faults of generalizations, tolerance, and the faults of judgements.

    2) Exaggerations. I’m pretty sure the majority of people can say that they’ve worn sweatpants to class. More importantly, why does that matter? Also, I have NEVER seen a tampon strewn across the floor here, but I did see one at other colleges. Finally, I have many friends here and NOT ONE of them have ever participated in the questionable behavior that you mention…

    3) The benefits of an all women’s college. You even mentioned yourself that “Some statistics show that graduates of women’s colleges perform better in their careers compared to women who graduate from coed schools” so how can one of your last statements that Wesleyan is better than Bryn Mawr for preparedness hold up? Truth is, our college helps eliminate stereotype threat that is a valid psychological phenomenon that hinders women’s performance. Truth is, Bryn Mawr provides opportunities for coed interaction (every single class that I’m taking this semester has at least one male). Truth is, Bryn Mawr provides an education enviable by other colleges and thus is ranked as one of the best colleges in the nation. How can we obtain those rankings and hold the prestige of a top tiered college if it we were not one of the bests?

    You should apologize for your gross generalizations, judgments, and overall ignorance.

    Sincerely,
    Ashley Hahn BMC ’14

    • Ashley Hahn BMC’14

      I know there are grammatical errors. I did not check this because I have a midterm and a paper due tomorrow, yet at the same time I felt the need to post something.

    • impartial BMC student

      So what are you doing now? Judging her? Hypocritical bitch, don’t talk if you can’t back it up please :) thank you.

      • JPReilly

        Why can’t you leave it at “hypocrite”? Why do women, which is even more deplorable than men, need to refer to women who speak up, (especially when you don’t like their tone), as “bitch”? Can you not see the anti-female judgment in that?

      • impartial my ass.

        You’re rude.
        :) thank you.

      • Concerned Bryn Mawr Student

        WOW. Cyber bullying anyone? She did back up what she said and other BMC students backed it up for her. So many more comments on here are 100% worse than hers, why don’t you comment on them?

        How is she a hypocritical bitch? She didn’t judge Ms. Chu she just pointed out that her argument has gross generalizations (which is true), that the girl judged a lot of people (which is true), that she was ignorant (which is true because she didn’t understand that Bryn Mawr is very highly ranked and she was discrediting it which shows her lack of knowledge and thus ignorance) and that women colleges such as Bryn Mawr is a good institution.

        If anything as a Bryn Mawr student you should be supporting her and liking the comment because she was sticking up for your college. You should be thanking her rather than inappropriately calling her a bitch.

        How do you think Ashley would feel if she read that? What if she was having a really bad day and then read your comment calling her a hypocritical bitch.

        Do you even know her? I do and she doesn’t deserve that. She is really involved at Bryn Mawr and loves her college which I’m sure is why she wrote this.

        By the way, at least Ashley had the courage to write her name and year. How about you, clearly not impartial BMC student, I guess you’ll just hide.

        I dare you to tell who you are so the world will know. Ashley’s comment is harmless and your comment is incredibly inappropriate and a terrible example of Bryn Mawr College.

        You should apologize to Ashley in person for your despicable words toward her; it’s what any REAL Bryn Mawr woman would do.

      • Ashley Hahn BMC ’14

        My friend just alerted me of this. I can’t believe another Bryn Mawr woman would degrade another like that. What did I ever do to you? I’m sorry that I cared about my college and decided to stick up for it. I love Bryn Mawr and am not afraid to voice my opinion.

        How dare you call me a bitch! Do you even know who I am, what I’ve been through, or anything about me at all? Because I guarantee if you got to know me you would think the exact opposite.

        I don’t have to justify myself to you, but I’d love to know who you are. We all have haters and I guess you just might not like me for some reason because I have a feeling any person in their right mind would not post such a mean comment on a little post like I wrote.

        I hope you have the guts to come up to me and tell me in person who you are; I’d just like to know so that I can change your opinion.

        I’m incredibly offended by your comment and honestly it really upset me. I don’t understand how my comment deserved a reaction like that. Please think before you type because not to sound lame and I am not ashamed but that really hurt me. I gave Vicky a fair critique and didn’t slander her name, possible job future, her armpits, her sexual or sanitary habits or anything. I just said what SHE EVEN ACKNOWLEDGED in her apology.

        Please come see me in person or non-anonymously and explain to me how I’m hypocritical or how I’m a bitch. I’d love to know because just as you said I couldn’t back it up when I did, you actually couldn’t back your opinion up.

        Thanks. PS. Email or facebook me, once again gain some courage and confront me, isn’t that what we’re learning at Bryn Mawr. I bet you’ll hide like a coward and not reveal yourself.

      • Molly Pieri, BMC Class ’09

        Now *that’s* what I’m talking about. Way to have a good ol’ fashioned BMC Confrontation, Ashley. It’s about addressing the problem, finding a solution, and moving forward. I love my alma mater. Also, as I’ve said before, enough with the anonymous posts, folks. You wouldn’t do it in the campus center, and you shouldn’t do it here.

        -Molly, BMC ’09

  • Bryn Mawr Owl

    You just don’t give a HOOT about anyone or anything. Thanks for transferring, hope your ignorance gets you far in life!

  • Bryn Mawr Student

    The only fault I see in Bryn Mawr is ever accepting you.

  • impartial BMC student

    Lay off this girl. Its her goddamn opinion- you are debasing YOURSELVES by posting these comments. She has a right to say her beliefs- freedom of press- and all of you are embarrasing Bryn Mawr.

  • Vicky Chu <3

    Thank you for putting this article out to the world, and more importantly on the internet so that now all of us “oversized sweatpant” wearing girls can go throw around our soiled, bloody tampons around in protest! You gave us a new hobby…we can finally leave our “isolated bubble” to tell the world how happy we are that Ms. Chu left Bryn Mawr. :)

    Sincerely,

    The girl who apparently is not normal and loves doing unmentionable things according to my new BFF Ms. Vicky Chu

    xoxoxoxo

  • Women’s College Convert

    Vicky,

    As a graduate of Barnard College, I would warn you against making generalizations about women’s colleges that are based solely upon your experience at Bryn Mawr. Barnard is a phenomenal place where women do not go to class wearing sweatpants (and even if they did, what’s wrong with that?) and tend not to leave bloody tampons strewn on the floor. I’m here to inform you that Barnard is also a place that can, and does, function independently of the coeducational institution that sits right across the street.

    You are completely right to say that women’s colleges are not normal; they aren’t, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Barnard is not a “normal” place, and its students are not “normal” either, thank goodness for that. We are highly motivated, we are poised and assertive, and we do quite well in the Real World. We do not burn bras on the weekend, we are not all raging lesbian feminists, and we only glare at the Columbia football player in our class when he says something stupid.

    It takes a certain level of maturity to decide to attend a women’s college in the first place – and a certain level of independence to attend Barnard particularly –, but it also takes a certain type of young woman to be able to thrive there. I’m so sorry that you weren’t pleased with your experience at Bryn Mawr, and I don’t blame you: it’s not for everyone. I’ll be the first to say that I did not love being in a single-sex environment. In fact, I hated my first year at college and, yes, I sorely missed testosterone in my everyday life. But by the time I graduated, I had absolutely no regrets. I could not be more proud and appreciative of my education and of everything Barnard had to offer me, academic or otherwise, and I gained a sense of self there that is simply incomparable to what you’d find at “normal” college. I even did unmentionable things with men in New York City sometimes, and I didn’t have to take a bus to get there.

    I am not embarrassed to say that I attended Barnard College not because of but despite its all-women’s environment. If I were applying to college all over again, though, I would apply because of, not despite this aspect. It’s too bad that you were unable to see the benefits of an “abnormal” college like Bryn Mawr, but I’m sure you will be more than happy at Wesleyan, which is a wonderful school itself.

    Transferring out of a women’s college and writing this piece does not make you an ignorant, shallow, or unintelligent person. All it means is that you weren’t quite ready to embrace a college that is more known for its outstanding education and promotion of female empowerment than for its social life. I think it’s a little silly, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with that.

    Sincerely,
    Barnard ‘10

    • raginglesbianfeminist

      “raging lesbian feminists”? really?! Come on, Barnard Woman–surely you can do better than that trite stereotype?

  • Sharanya Sharma, BMC ’11

    Dear Ms. Chu,

    In your first section of arguments, you do the following:

    a) Look down upon women for wearing sweatpants to class (topic: clothes)

    b) Mention hearsay about sexual relationships between students and professors (topic: gossip)

    c) Make faulty statements about male students and their treatment thereof by both faculty and students (topic: boys)

    If clothes, gossip, and boys were the first things to enter your mind when pondering a “classroom” or “academic” environment, then I am not even remotely sorry you did not find what you wanted at Bryn Mawr.

    When I think of a classroom environment, I think about the intellectual level of my peers (whether they are male or female), the breadth and depth of discussion and the ways in which I can broaden my critical thinking skills, and the guidance and support offered by those who teach me. I do not give two shits (to put it bluntly) about who is wearing what, or who is sleeping with whom, or who is what gender/race/ethnicity/etc etc.

    And that, right there, Ms. Chu, is exactly why I and many other are proud graduates of an institution that offered us dedicated support, lively, far-reaching, and deep conversations about Judy B., Foucault and many many others (…see, I can name-throw too!), as well as close bonds with professors whose dedication has had a deep and lasting impact on the way I view the world.

    – Sharanya Sharma

    PS: I will never, ever ever apologize for calling for the end of the system of oppression that is called the patriarchy (which hurts both women and men). Ever.

  • Women’s College Convert

    Vicky,

    As a graduate of Barnard College, I would warn you against making generalizations about women’s colleges that are based solely upon your experience at Bryn Mawr. Barnard is a phenomenal place where women do not go to class wearing sweatpants (and even if they did, what’s wrong with that?) and tend not to leave bloody tampons strewn on the floor. I’m here to inform you that Barnard is also a place that can, and does, function independently of the coeducational institution that sits right across the street.

    You are completely right to say that women’s colleges are not normal; they aren’t, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Barnard is not a “normal” place, and its students are not “normal” either, thank goodness for that. We are highly motivated, we are poised and assertive, and we do quite well in the Real World. We do not burn bras on the weekend, we are not all raging lesbian feminists, and we only glare at the Columbia football player in our class when he says something stupid.

    It takes a certain level of maturity to decide to attend a women’s college in the first place – and a certain level of independence to attend Barnard particularly –, but it also takes a certain type of young woman to be able to thrive there. I’m so sorry that you weren’t pleased with your experience at Bryn Mawr, and I don’t blame you: it’s not for everyone. I’ll be the first to say that I did not love being in a single-sex environment. In fact, I hated my first year at college and, yes, I sorely missed testosterone in my everyday life. But by the time I graduated, I had absolutely no regrets. I could not be more proud and appreciative of my education and of everything Barnard had to offer me, academic or otherwise, and I gained a sense of self there that is simply incomparable to what you’d find at “normal” college. I even did unmentionable things with men in New York City sometimes, and I didn’t have to take a bus to get there.

    I am not embarrassed to say that I attended Barnard College not because of but despite its all-women’s environment. If I were applying to college all over again, though, I would apply because of, not despite this aspect. It’s too bad that you were unable to see the benefits of an “abnormal” college like Bryn Mawr, but I’m sure you will be more than happy at Wesleyan, which is a wonderful school itself.

    Transferring out of a women’s college and writing this piece does not make you an ignorant, shallow, or unintelligent person. All it means is that you weren’t quite ready to embrace a college that is more known for its outstanding education and promotion of female empowerment than for its social life. It seems a little “silly” to me, but to each her own.

    Sincerely,
    Barnard ‘10

  • grrr.

    HOW.DARE.YOU.
    You just made all of Wesleyan want to disown you. forrr shameeee.

  • BMC Rei Shimizu ’10

    Here’s a little about me Vicky.

    Fucked around at Swat and Haverford? Guilty.
    Engaged in activities that reinforce negative stereotypes? Guilty.
    Demeaned myself to gain validation from coed students? Guilty.
    Hell, I even abandoned Bryn Mawr my sophomore year to live at Haverford.

    I am proud and thankful that I was in these guilty situations at Bryn Mawr College, a place where I learned from these experiences without feeling shame. Bryn Mawr and the wonderful women I met are truly the sisters I never had. It is a supportive community where women grow in various ways, at their own unique pace. We embrace each women’s individuality, no matter how or when it is expressed. Through our differences we find a commonality; the strength and invaluable nature of empowered women. The support network continues throughout life and so does the learning experience.

    So Bryn Mawr College is not just a women’s college, its me.
    It’s who I am.

    Guilty and Proud,

    Rei Shimizu ’10

  • Brigitta

    Dear Vicky,

    Yes “women’s college” is the preferred term. Personally I take great joy in correcting people. I like to imagine their perception of me changing from one of a “little girl” skipping off to her classes to one of a mature woman who kills the patriarchy in her spare time. I might be one of the few people who thinks this way though, some may also prefer the term women’s college because the first women’s colleges were set up in order to offer women an education aligning with the MEN’S institutions. It would be detrimental to identify the members of the sister colleges as “girls” while referring to the members of their brother schools as “men.” I’m currently taking classes with men and women, but if you would like to refer to college age people as girls and boys feel free to do so.

    I can’t argue with your claim that women’s colleges aren’t normal. No, they’re not. Then again it isn’t normal to be a part of the fortunate few able to attend a private liberal arts college for four years, single sex or coed. It probably isn’t normal to read Foucault and Judith Butler and discuss social constructions. I did not choose Bryn Mawr to have the “normal” college experience, but what is it that makes us abnormal?

    Well, I guess my day is pretty normal. I roll out of bed around 10:00 am for my 10:00 am class. It’s okay; I can get up that late because I don’t change out of the sweat pants that I wear to bed. Once I wander into class I see him, the one male in my class. I saunter over because I know I’m looking good in these sweats today and take the seat next to him. Suddenly I’m stuck in this horrible dilemma do I demean myself for validation or glare angrily? Oh what my women’s college education has brought me to!

    Oh wait. I forgot to mention that I wake up every day with what I call the “D to the P” alarm system. I keep my windows open so that the voices of my fellow students doing their all day everyday shouting of “Death to the Patriarchy” can wake me up.

    In all seriousness however, I am sorry that you did not have a good experience at Bryn Mawr. Women’s colleges are not a fit for everyone and I am glad that you found a college that works for you. Women should challenge gender inequalities, and women’s colleges are not the only environments where that is possible. However, these do foster an environment that confronts gender discrimination and stereotypes.

    Dealing with inequalities is not simply about “dealing directly with men who impose them upon us” (and may I add that often women impose these inequalities as well). Dealing with inequalities is about realizing the problematic structural underpinnings of our society, which can be realized in a coed or women’s college. Empowerment is not about me correcting someone for referring to my school as “girls-school”, empowerment is about recognizing the inequalities within our society and knowing that we are above the inequality. Bryn Mawr has empowered me. Throughout my past two years here I have met powerful and inspirational women, who have helped me gain more than an academic education but an education in how to enter the “real world” as a strong woman who continues to challenge the injustices that women within our society face.

    In two years I will be a proud graduate of Bryn Mawr College, and when people say to me “Bryn Mawr? Pennsylvania? The all-girls school?”

    I will answer, “Yes, that’s the one.”

    All the best,
    Brigitta

  • Bryn Mawr 2009

    I am a 2009 grad of Bryn Mawr College.

    For full disclosure let me be clear: I did not always like Bryn Mawr. The girls were weird! We had to take a bus to see boys! Why don’t we look like the Villanova girls down the street?! Bryn Mawr was a daily struggle for me. However, I am now in law school with some of the most “normal” people in the country, and let me tell you- I miss Bryn Mawr. Mawrtyrs are a unique breed. Their creatively, intelligence, drive, morals, etc.. are unmatched. It is only now that I see those who did not go to Bryn Mawr, that I appreciate what a unique, special, and rewarding college experience I had. Wesleyan is a fantastic school and I am happy to have many alums as my friends, but you (Ms. Chu) are missing out on something very special.

  • Concerned Tri-Co Member

    To the Wesleyan student body: It’s a shame that Ms. Chu’s article found its way into a publication baring Wesleyan’s name.

    To Vicky Chu: Consider what the “normal” college experience entails. As a former member of the Tri-Co community, I’ll be the first to admit that there are certain features (social and … oh right – academic?), which make the Tri-Co a unique environment. Taken individually, each institution in the Tri-Co has its’ own set of idiosyncrasies. These quirks, albeit some quirkier than others, are what make ANY college experience special. Granted, I’m not sure where you’re coming from with the whole ‘tampons-on-the-ground’ bit. That’s blatantly untrue.

    Let’s be honest here, this is a publication in the “Wesleyan Argus.” Will it ruin your life? Probably not. I’m sure you’ll skim over some of these blog posts as I have, but my advice to you is this… Consider what readers are saying, but also recognize what readers aren’t. Very few have come to your defense and less still champion your cause – for good reason. I hope you will realize, of equal importance to the educational aspect of college life are those friendships that you develop and maintain beyond your years as an undergrad. I strongly recommend you think more carefully before you write such crass, ignorant articles – with the sincerest hope that you don’t burn more bridges before you even have a chance to build them.

    Cheers,
    Tri-Co ’11

  • BMC’14

    I would be lying if I said that I do not on occasion doubt the purpose and effectiveness of women’s-only education. If what we seek is a society blind to gender differences, then shouldn’t separating ourselves by gender be counterproductive? Statements like those made in this article and in many of the comments, however, suggest to me that society still has far too many unexamined and problematic notions of gender that will never be resolved if we simply ignore them. I understand that this is not what the article is advocating, but I am not convinced that ignoring isn’t exactly what I personally would do at a co-ed college or university, as I did at a co-ed high school. Perhaps this is merely evidence of my own faults, but I do not believe that I am the only one who has been more encouraged in this environment to address these issues than she (or he) has been elsewhere, or felt more comfortable doing so. To me, this is one advantage of women’s-only education among many.

  • Nikki Lopez BMC ’10

    By now many have already read and responded to the above article. I, too, like many of the mawrters and non- mawrters alike felt disturbed at the very skewed portrayal of Bryn Mawr College . So, I write not only to defend my experience at Bryn Mawr, but to defend those who are current students, and alumni of the seven sisters, and to all the other women’s colleges around the country.

    The most I can say is that I am sorry Miss Vicky Chu transferred out of Bryn Mawr with such a perception. If indeed that was her account let’s not negate it. However, I do write to say that while she consider it as so, this is not the Bryn Mawr I know. This is not the Bryn Mawr I would want the Wesleyan community to consider, and the rest of the public that has access to this article. Was Bryn Mawr the perfect place? Of course not. As with most institutions of higher education in this country, I encountered issues of unaddressed racism, discrimination and ignorance about class issues. I heard absurd comments about Latinos and Black communities in the hallways of the dorms. I came from a class generation where the number of Latina-identified students at Bryn Mawr I could count on my hands and feet alone. But did this deter me from ensuring that I had the best possible undergraduate experience I could? No.

    What I have always stressed, is that the experience one has at Bryn Mawr is simply what you choose to make of it. Did I have my moments where I wanted to scream and rip my hair out because I was bored with the strange awkward parties and social life? Yes of course. So what did I do? I invited my good friends over and had a dance party in my dorm room. Or I took the Septa train and headed straight into Philadelphia for the “real world”. Or a weekend trip to New York City would suffice. Instead I chose to focus on the positive things that I thought the institution could give me.

    What Bryn Mawr gave me, that I don’t think I could have experienced elsewhere was a sense of connection and purpose in my pursuit of..well whatever it was that I was pursuing. Whether it was conquering that one 15 page paper that was getting to me, or engaging in heavy intellectual discourse where I felt like the odd person out, or obtaining that internship I wanted so badly. Most of what I did at Bryn Mawr, as simple or as grand of a task, I did with a sense of self conviction I haven’t been able to match out here in the “real world”. Bryn Mawr has a way of fostering that type of conviction and connection.

    Because of Bryn Mawr I developed real growth inducing relationships from students from the concrete jungles of the South Bronx to the lands of Palestine. This was my community. Because of Bryn Mawr I developed growth inducing relationships from students of the African nations to the ancient Asian countries. My closest friends were from the Pacific North West of the United States to Japan. From Gambia to the Caribbean to South America. West Coast, East Coast, Chicanos, Boston, New York, The South. They were of the Muslim, Christian, Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist and of the Baha’i faith. They were Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgendered, Queer, Questioning, Heterosexual, Straight. You know that bumper sticker that says Co-Exist? Bryn Mawr allowed that space of Co-existing to happen.

    Bryn Mawr made it possible that a community of true diversity could work, with the given time and patience practiced by its community members.

    The most important gift I got from Bryn Mawr was the affirmation that I could exist. As a food stamp baby-poet -gender-bending, Spanglish speaking- womyn loving-Boricua queer-arroz- con abichuelas- hija de los orishas- feminist-dj-hip hop head—I can attest and say there are very few communities that accepted or have accepted me in all my identities. Bryn Mawr was a community that did. And still does.

    Is Bryn Mawr for everyone? Of course not nor would I ignorantly stand on a soap box and say that it is. So I would encourage those to find the path that is right for them. But I will not accept a skewed portrayal of a particular beginning of a journey to be published-especially when that person did not fulfill that place in it’s entirety. For those that do choose a place like Bryn Mawr College as their path, may it be one that is blessed, with ever changing evolution. In the spirit of Bryn Mawr, I say, ANASSA KATA to all my fellow Mawrters young and old.

  • CS

    It is so wonderful to see a group of ardent feminists debunk and invalidate the use of the “personal narrative”, a misleading rhetorical strategy feminists have relied upon for decades. I hope you’ll apply this level of rigor to the narratives of those you view in a sympathetic light or with whom you tend to agree, rather than uncritically accepting it as “true” simply because it was written or told by a woman.

  • BMC’14

    I am interested in the stressed distinction between correlation and causation towards the beginning of the article. The author concedes, however indirectly, that Bryn Mawr has or has graduated a disproportionate number of strong women. She writes that these women are not strong because they attend or attended Bryn Mawr, but because they already were. In other words, Bryn Mawr attracts a disproportionate number of strong women. This attraction must be a result of some characteristic unique to Bryn Mawr. If that is it’s single-sex environment, then that suggests an obvious validation for single-sex education: it allows women to be a part of and benefit from a community of strong women, regardless of how they came to be so.

  • Sigh…

    As a Wesleyan alum who went on to work in journalism, I am appalled that the Argus published this piece!

    To those commenters who have been waving the “freedom of speech” flag: REALLY NOW?! If this had appeared on the author’s personal blog, then I would absolutely say “sure, it’s your opinion so feel free to sing it from the rooftops, with all of your sweeping generalizations and grammatical errors,” but let’s look at the situation…

    This was printed in a college affiliated paper that can directly impact the way the school is perceived. Does this mean the author now does not have a RIGHT to express her opinions? Nope. The Argus, of course, CAN publish whatever it pleases even if it turns the school into a laughing stock…but here is where the common sense should kick in. How could no one on the editorial board realize that this article could, maybe…possibly, make Wesleyan look absolutely stupid?!

    What is worse is the fact that the editors put an article out that breaks the cardinal rule of journalism: Did the author do her diligence? The fact that this piece is filed under the opinions section seems to be brought up time and time again, but that does not give it free reign to turn into a personal rant with no basis! This is still a college publication that should adhere to the most basic publishing standards!

    While I do agree that most of the blame for this article falls on the author herself, I would also like to see a letter of apology from the current Argus EIC for making my old paper into the butt of many jokes in the office. My directly superior actually said “well, looks like we’re not hiring anyone from Wesleyan this year…or ever again.” Even though he said it in jest and even though he knows he is making a gross generalization – the fact of the matter is that in the back of his mind he now associates Wesleyan with this disgusting article and that will likely influence his hiring decisions in the future (even if it is just slightly). In case you haven’t noticed, the job market is brutal, so coming into the process with a mark against you (not matter how small) could make a huge difference. Speaking with other alums, they say a similar thing is happening in their offices. Yes, it’s completely unfair but that, Vicky Chu, is how the real world works.

    • Wellesley ’12

      Completely agree! I am actually surprised that more people have not brought up the effect this article could likely have on the rest of the Wesleyan community. As a current Wellesley senior, I know I cringe every time someone brings up that dreaded Rolling Stone article. I actually had an interviewer mention it once, even though it was published way back in 2001!

      The truth of the matter is, some friends, superiors, co-workers, etc. are going to be judgmental either intentionally or unintentionally – we’re all human after all! For small liberal arts schools especially, these seemingly little things that are done by a small group of people (or just the author in this case) can result in unexpected fallout for the rest of us :(

    • Ll

      Jobs in journalism? What jobs in journalism? They are going the way of the all-women’s college.

  • Just Another Mawrtyr Here

    As the daughter of a Wellesley alum and as a current Bryn Mawr student myself, I think it’s safe to say that I am very much offended by this opinion piece and its attacks on single-sex education. More than anything however, I am saddened and confused by what you have to say. Mostly, why is it that you even felt the need to write this in the first place?

    Correct me if I’m wrong, but your biggest problem with Bryn Mawr was how it didn’t fit in with your idea of a “normal” college experience. Like some commenters have already noted, what is defined as “normal” in this context? I’ll have to leave that one up to you to answer for yourself, but for now I can provide my own (shortened) answer.

    While looking for colleges, I didn’t have an idea of normalcy in mind so much as finding a school with phenomenal academics, a great range of opportunities, and an environment where I could fully take advantage of whatever I wanted to achieve during my years here. I chose Bryn Mawr for a myriad of reasons, but one important one was that I found it to be a safe space. I can breathe here, I can relax and be myself in a way that I cannot in where I’ve lived in before, and most importantly: as a result I can study and focus on academics more effectively without having social issues such as keeping closeted or perpetually silent regarding my thoughts, opinions, and ideas hanging over me constantly. It’s provided a wonderful space in which I can expand my mind (and yes, my social life too) without the pressures of inhibiting myself as my previous educational experiences had proven.

    My point here is that maybe Bryn Mawr just didn’t fit you well because you couldn’t understand the sort of experience that it creates. Hey, I find that I just don’t understand the stereotypical, heteronormative, “normal” culture that you find in most places, not just college; so that’s a point of view that I can understand. What I don’t understand, is why you felt the need to vent this in such a way that offended and slandered an entire group and culture of people whom you don’t even know, even long after you’ve left for an environment that better suits your ideals. You’re now happier at a coed school (and a good one at that); that’s great! So why take something that didn’t work out for you, and that by all accounts should be behind you by now, and ruin it for so many others for whom it’s in fact a blessing?

    I just don’t know.

  • Ex BMC ’13

    As a former Bryn Mawr student (I transferred to co-ed liberal arts institution) and the sister of a Seven Sisters alumna, I was incredibly disheartened to read this article, to say the least.

    The majority of my formative years were shaped by the courageous and compassionate women who attended both the Seven Sisters and other respective women’s colleges. I am the product of a single-sex high school where a Wellesley woman was the Headmistress- ironically, a Mawrtyr was recently named her replacement. These women are my role models, sisters, and friends- women who have both nurtured and encouraged me, through my moments of triumph and defeat.

    I am truly grateful for the year I spent at Bryn Mawr- I was unsure of my academic potential and without the gentle prodding of the faculty (Phenomenal is an insufficient adjective and frankly, I’m not sure if there is one to properly describe the likes of those who hold posts within the Art History and English departments), I never would have found my confidence as a student and even as a young woman. College is such a transitional time for each girl (and boy) and if there’s one thing I have come to learn, no one experience is ever alike.

    I realized that for my own personal growth, it was necessary for me to learn to interact with men in both an academic setting and the greater community. I was far too shy and far too lazy to make the effort to commute to Haverford and Swarthmore on a daily basis. The problem was not with Bryn Mawr- it was with me.

    You should not blame Bryn Mawr for an experience it could never fully provide and believe me, the College does it’s damnedest to serve every girl’s needs, as I’m sure you are well aware of given the support and kindness the Deans provide to those transferring out of Bryn Mawr. I was even told that if I was unsatisfied with my current institution, I’d be welcomed back wholeheartedly.

    I’m surprised you even wrote this article to begin with- if you are so content to be a student at Wesleyan, why would you write an article like this? This type of behavior only breeds animosity and ill will and if that was your intent, you succeeded. But I highly doubt that- it seems like it was a slow news day over at the Argus and you felt compelled to whine about how Bryn Mawr failed to please you. Bryn Mawr no longer has any effect on you given that you are no longer a tuition-paying member of the community/do not attend Plenary (Did you even go when you were there?); therefore, you do not reserve the right to complain.

    Out of respect for your former peers and to those I met at Bryn Mawr and lovingly call my sisters, please issue an apology. Same goes to the Wellesley women- because quite frankly, many of those ladies are running this world and it would be to your advantage to do so. My experience in a single-sex environment, during both high school and college, taught me to always help a fellow sister. We should be building each other up- not ripping each other down and you sadly, did the exact opposite.

  • Jcarter

    I’m just gonna say, no matter how much you disagree with her arguement or whatever it was HER experience at Bryn Mawr. Haverford and BMC are both very selective communities. like actually either you fit or you don’t there really isn’t a middle ground. I completely understand how she feels about the bi-co. and while she spoke generally about single sex schools were feelings i’m guessing she felt against the bi-co community in general. so everyone calm your tatas and accept that not everyone finds the little sphere of BMC as awesome and righteous blah blah blah as you.

  • Jennifer Wes’86

    When I was at Wesleyan 25 years ago, it was all “Death to the Patriarchy,” and enormous sweatpants. I guess times have changed. We managed to throw away our tampons, but I feel the women of Bryn Mawr do that too.

  • BMC student

    I’m more amused at this article than anything. Why get worked up? Let’s have a laugh and get on with our lives. Look at how much time has been spent today reading and commenting on this article, myself included. Have none of us had anything better to do? Who are we to judge her? We’re no more qualified to judge her than she is to judge us—-after all, a great deal of us here were accepted at Bryn Mawr (or at other women’s colleges), just as Vicky was. It was her choice to leave, just as it’s our choice to stay. It’s her choice to write foolish articles, and it’s our choice to read it and write comments. I don’t think she wrote the article thinking, “Wow, I’m an absolute idiot,” and we don’t write our comments thinking that we’re idiots. We’re all just trying our best in life. We try to get a sense of value the way we can—-sometimes we try to get it by joining groups or by putting others down. I do not necessarily agree with the content of the article above, but I don’t scoff at it or feel enraged by it. I don’t care. Why would any of us let what others do or say bother us? Maybe because it challenges our sense of value? It’s up to us to find that value within ourselves, just as Vicky could have done instead of writing this article. But she didn’t find it within herself, and neither are we, clearly. To some maybe, a Bryn Mawr woman is supposed to defend herself until she’s blue in the face. To me, a Bryn Mawr woman should be able to deflect the insults and find it within herself to not let petty things bother her. Why stop and smell the dogshit when we can stop and smell the roses? Live and let live. Don’t we want peace?

  • Anonymous

    I would just like to preface this by saying that this article does not reflect on Wellesley, Wesleyan or Bryn Mawr, but rather the author. All three schools are wonderful institutions that any student would be lucky to study at.

    I am a Bryn Mawr freshman who did not choose this school because I am a tampon-flinging feminist, but rather, someone who would like to receive the best education I can. I am sorry that Ms. Chu’s experience at Bryn Mawr was so horrible that even after a considerable amount of time, she is still complaining about the despicable nature of BMC. I am only two months in, but I have already met a wide variety of women who I am honored to know. The girls I have met have ranged from fashionistas to athletes to total bookworms and they have all been equally intelligent and kind.

    Although, as with almost any schools that are so closely related, there are rivalries, I have had mostly pleasant experiences with the Haverford students, both male and female. When there are students from the other schools in my classes, they are not lauded nor alienated, but they blend in with the other students, and I am thankful that my college allows me to expand my experience to other colleges with such insightful students.

    I would also like to address some of the comments about how students should not leave the campus so much. I am a freshman who goes to the other campuses once or twice a week and so far, this has benefited me greatly. I make that choice because I know that going off campus allows me to have a “normal” college experience when I want, as well as the privilege of being in such a special place as Bryn Mawr.

    Yes, there are feminists, and yes people wear sweatpants, but I refuse to believe that this is an experience that is solely limited to the Seven Sister Schools. I think that I am lucky to be able to be in a school that celebrates so many different cultures and schools of thought. I am truly sorry that in the time you spent here, the concepts of acceptance and open-mindedness were blocked by the chants of feminism and female hygiene products.

    Even more than I am sorry for you, I am sorry that the Argus chose to publish this article; as I know people who go to Wesleyan, this does not reflect the opinion of your school, but rather a bitter student who can’t seem to appreciate how lucky she was to attend Bryn Mawr or Wesleyan at all.

  • Anonymous

    Well thank you, Vicky Chu, for not coming to Hollins. We really like sweatpants. Much as strong and independent women seek a college atmosphere that will enrich their experience, so do those women who love sweat pants seek Hollins. Also women who don’t love sweat pants. And women who are wondering if you think patriarchy is….good? What’re you getting at here, exactly?

  • bryn mawr ’14

    Well Vicky, I’m first going to say that I hope you’re happy at Wesleyan. Hopefully there are no tampons on the floor and no girls wearing oversized sweatpants to class there. You’re free to think however you want, but remember that you really need to be careful when you’re publishing your thoughts. Look what you’ve done here; you have offended your former classmates, friends, professors, and other faculty of Bryn Mawr. You somehow managed to bring in Wellesley into this article (which was completely unncessary), and guess what, you’ve offended the entire Wellesley community as well. I am sure that some students at Wesleyan are ashamed upon reading this, as I can tell from some of the responses. It’s true that you left us, but that does not mean that you are justified to publish your exaggerated (not to mention FALSE) “opinions” on Bryn Mawr. You clearly don’t belong here, and we don’t want you here either. If you’re happy at Wesleyan, that’s great. Glorify Wesleyan all you want, as you proudly say “I’d choose Wesleyan over Wellesley.” Bryn Mawr, however, is out of your reach. You don’t have the right to make such statements about us, and you should be ashamed and realize what kind of a mess you have just created here. Even if you don’t (which is certainly a possibility seeing how your mind works), you probably realize at this point that MANY people have been offended by this piece of writing, as you can tell by the comments. Words are more powerful than you think, and you need to be careful with them.

    Good luck.

  • Kate Callahan, BMC ’07

    Dear Ms. Chu,

    I am sorry to hear that you decided to attend Bryn Mawr and did not find what you were looking for. I sincerely hope that you have found happiness at your new school home.

    That said, I have some serious issues with your article. The first, and perhaps most important, is that you brought Wellesley into it, in spite of having no direct experience with that institution. The fact that Wesleyan and Wellesley have similar names does not excuse using it as a substitute for the college you had the real issue with, especially when writing in such a completely denigrating manner. Your problems and experiences were at Bryn Mawr. Leave Wellesley out of it.

    The second issue is that your accusations are simply untrue. I have never worn sweatpants to class. I don’t think I’ve owned a pair since I was about 8. Most of my friends and classmates were routinely well dressed, or at least well enough dressed to be seen in public. I will admit to slipping into the library in my PJs to grab another book for my thesis in the middle of the night, but I certainly never journeyed out in daylight without at least jeans.

    I have never seen feminine hygiene supplies strewn about the floor, used or otherwise. In fact, in my experience, the grungiest bathrooms were the co-ed ones. Bryn Mawr women are meticulous about keeping the bathrooms clean, and those who aren’t are confronted by hallmates almost immediately. In addition, our wonderful housekeepers cleaned the bathrooms daily.

    As for affairs with professors, I never heard one such whisper. I knew that they happened from time to time, but certainly it was not a prevalent topic of discussion or speculation as you suggest in your article.

    I have known women whose entire lives involved going to Haverford and Swarthmore to have sex with any random man they could find. In my experience, those women spend more time off campus, and therefore don’t bond as well with other students. In many cases, the women who were more interested in chasing boys than focusing on studies and friendships found themselves outcast, and it sometimes resulted in transfers. And certainly, more freshmen spend their time off campus in search of boyfriends than upperclasswomen, but I believe that’s a combination of culture shock and having less work freshman year. Bottom line, about 98% of Mawrtyrs live on campus, and very few leave for the whole weekend. That means a whole lot more time to study, and build connections and friendships.

    I won’t say I didn’t consider transferring. It’s an intense environment, and I found myself in some sticky social situations. Fortunately, I had supportive friends and I pushed through the tough stuff. In the end, I was glad that I stayed. I’ve met some of my best friends at BMC. I’ve learned to speak a language that has lead me to travel, live abroad, and find true love. I’ve learned that feminism is about equality. I did not find a bunch of man-hating lesbians. I found a group of women (and transmen and men and others who do not fit any of those categories) of all orientations and creeds who were looking for equality, friendship, education, and the chance to change the world.

    Normal, I have found, is simply a state of mind. No, a single sex environment is not normal. It is special. If it were ordinary and common, it would lose that which makes it special. But just like anything different or special, it is not for everyone.

    It seems like you have a lot of resentment towards your time at Bryn Mawr, and I truly hope that you can work through that. I wish you the best, and hope that this mess does not reflect too poorly on you in the future. In the meantime, I encourage you to write truth, and to use your skills to build up and support others, rather than tearing them down.

    Kate Callahan, BMC ’07

    • Molly Pieri, BMC ’09

      Hi Kate- I completely agree with most of your comment, but I feel like I need to chip in real quick to defend the folks (like me) who took advantage of the Tri-Co for social diversion… Or, as every one seems to assume it all boils down to this one thing: sex.

      First, let me say that yes: I went to Swarthmore at least once a week for almost my entire time at Bryn Mawr. I often stayed the night. While I would not qualify the acitivities in which I participated as “unmentionable” as Ms. Chu does, I do consider them private, between me and the man to whom I was then dating and to whom am currently engaged. (And no, Ms. Chu, he was not a member of any sports team.)

      I do not feel as if I missed out on my Bryn Mawr experience because I such a significant part of my social life (both with my significant other, and Swattie friends that I met through him) at Swarthmore. I do not feel as if I am less of a student, or I received a poorer quality education because I pursued a romantic relationship during my time at school. I do not feel like less of a feminist because I met my future husband while attending college (and an all women’s college at that).

      I do feel like I received an excellent education at Bryn Mawr. I do feel like I participated as an active member of the Bryn Mawr community. I do feel that my relationship with my then boyfriend was a stabilizing force in my life that positively contributed to my ability to cope with the near-unmanageable workload that is double-majoring at BMC.

      Finally, I do feel that students should be encouraged to try to take advantage of both the social and academic opportunities presented by the Tri-Co consortium. Not because Bryn Mawr is somehow “incomplete” without its coed partner schools. And not only to do “unmentionable things” with students at co-ed institutions (which, by the way, why do we consider “sex” to be “unmentionable”, particularly when it comes to women seeking it out… A topic for another discussion, I suppose.) But because there are many more opportunities at our Tri-Co campuses for fun extracurriculars that no one small liberal arts school can offer.

      And if a student happens to find romance (or if she’s out there looking for it) I don’t think that that’s a bad thing. I know that I benefited immeasurably from my off-campus relationship during my time at Bryn Mawr: both emotionally and academically. I was also able to provide the same sort of support to my partner. We helped each other through the hard assignments, and through difficult parts of our lives. I am not ashamed of my relationship- it did not (and does not) make me less of a Mawrtyr. I want other young women to be able to seek that sort of relationship off-campus, and not feel guilty for doing so.

      I know that you, Kate, didn’t necessarily imply that any of the things I am arguing against here: you only suggested that a rabid preoccupation with things non-academic and off-campus can detract from the degree to which a young woman can find her place within Bryn Mawr’s close-knit community. And I agree with you. But your sentiment does resemble a disturbing notion- first proposed in Ms. Chu’s article, and echoed throughout the many, many comments here: that seeking off campus heterosexual relationships makes you less of a Mawrtyr, less of an academic, and less of a feminist. I want to take this opportunity to voice my opinion for the record: No, it does not.

      -Molly Pieri, BMC ’09.

      • Molly Pieri, BMC Class ’09

        Also, didn’t proof read this, and I’m already noticing some mistakes which should have been fixed (ie: “between me and the man to whom I was then dating and to whom am currently engaged.” should read “between me and the man I was then dating and to whom I am currently engaged”.) Please forgive these. I’ll try to remember to proofread my comments in the future.

        -Molly, BMC ’09

  • Tiger Momma

    Someone in my office knew that my high school age daughter is considering applying to an all women’s college (among other choices) for next year and suggested that I take a look at this article. I attended a coed LAC and have had no direct experience with women’s schools. When I finished reading Ms. Chu’s piece, I was skeptical. The experiences of one disgruntled student who transferred out of Bryn Mawr didn’t seem like an adequate basis by which to judge all women’s colleges. Then, I read these comments by current students and alumni of some of the most prestigious ones. Although there are some thoughtful posts here (particularly by BMC writers) and a few dissenting voices, I have to say that the overwhelming impression left by literally hundreds of commenters tends to confirm Ms. Chu’s observations. So many defensive and even vindictive comments! Hundreds of comments really can’t be easily dismissed as unrepresentative, particularly when there are so few voices disassociating themselves with the dominant view in this thread. I’m afraid that perhaps without intending to, you’ve made Ms. Chu’s point for her. Perhaps all this can be chalked up to school pride, but maybe there is more going on here. Ultimately, the decision of where to apply to college is up to my daughter. But, based on what I’ve read here, I can’t say I can endorse the all-women’s option for her.

    • BMC ’12

      An impression that we’re smart, strong, and stand up for ourselves unitedly in the face of ridiculous accusations? Why wouldn’t we be defensive?

    • bmc student

      Yes, it is true that we take great pride in our institution. You’re also right that there’s more going on here. I’m not sure if you understand the degree of offense she has inflicted on the entire Bryn Mawr community with this article. Being a Bryn Mawr student, of course I know the downsides of going to Bryn Mawr, and I myself has considered transferring from Bryn Mawr as well. This article, however, is largely untrue, and simply over-exaggerated. I was very offended upon reading this article, and let me tell you that most of my friends here love Bryn Mawr even more than I do. She is free to talk or write about her Bryn Mawr experiences, but it is certainly possible to do so without offending her old classmates.

      “Ultimately, the decision of where to apply to college is up to my daughter. But, based on what I’ve read here, I can’t say I can endorse the all-women’s option for her.”

      It is fine if you don’t find women’s colleges appealing; I know that many people don’t. I don’t think it is appropriate, however, to make such a statement in response to this particular article, because, as you can tell, most people that are reading your response at this point are probably students of Bryn Mawr and Wellesley. Women’s colleges have much more than the superficial qualities that are exaggerated here. Being a student at a women’s college, I don’t find your statement very pleasing.

      BMC student ’14

    • Troll in the dungeon!!!!!!!!

      Hey Troll Momma, please direct me to where in the comments, where we have “made Chu’s point for her.” Where doesn’t someone confirm any of the dumb-ass generalizations that she makes. Thank GOD you aren’t my mother.

      • Tiger Momma

        Honestly, they are too numerous to count. Your post would be one. Perhaps the worst are the threats to Ms. Chu’s future employment, which I find disturbing. But, the ad hominem nature of many of the posts and the vitriol they contain don’t speak well for your institutions and tend to support Ms. Chu’s thesis that other education options may be more attractive. P.S. What is a “troll”?

      • JP Reilly

        Tiger Momma,
        Until you have truly walked in the shoes of a minority and felt the sting of baseless, mean-spirited, endless comments, you will not understand where these young women are coming from. There is a tipping point which has been reached here and perhaps the students of all female colleges should actually thank Miss Chu because it has brought to light what so many misinformed people feel about these schools.
        Yes, perhaps words could have been chosen more wisely but I am thrilled to see young women defend themselves. Better word choice will come with age and wisdom but I would never seek to dampen such a fire in the soul.

    • PB

      Has it ever occurred to you that women who go to women’s colleges are CONSTANTLY dumped on, made fun of, and completely disregarded as having attended “lesser” institutions by most people? You know, people who go to Harvard and Yale do not need to defend their institutions. Society and mass media already do that for them. They never need to be bothered about the reputations of their schools. That goes for pretty much any co-ed college. What I find disturbing is that even after having had a liberal arts education, you are unable to see that people (and women in particular) who take the road less traveled and who make the unpopular decision, are the ones who are constantly put in the position of having to defend that choice.

      We as women’s college graduates react strongly to people who criticize our schools. Why? Because people are ALWAYS criticizing our schools. The typical image of an American college student is a keg-sucking, blonde-hair-flipping coed. Watch any Hollywood movie to confirm that. And we at women’s colleges work every single day to break down that stereotype. And for it, we are called “dykes,” we are judged for not being sexual enough (wearing sweatpants to class apparently qualifies), and one top of it we are made fun of if we take classes at coed institutions!

      But what you SHOULD read from all these hundreds of comments, ma’am, is the passion and complete adoration of women’s colleges that their graduates have for them. And the fact that they are willing to fight the good fight EVERY day… EVEN on this ridiculous, no-name column. Why? Because we’re a small group and people easily misjudge us, so even tiny articles like this make a difference to us. And because we KNOW that if you give women’s colleges a chance, they can do for you what no other place can do for you. They can give you what no other place on earth gives you.

      If you don’t give it a chance, then none of that will make sense to you. But I hope you (and your daughter), at least throw in the applications and do your research before deciding against a community of such amazing women, who stand tall for each other even in the most minute ways.

      If you can’t see that, I’m sorry.

    • Molly Pieri, BMC Class ’09

      Dear Tiger Momma,

      I can understand your concern given some of the comments you see here. Please allow me to explain why (I think) these comments were posted:

      During my time at Bryn Mawr, I had to confront many, many negative stereotypes from people who were unfamiliar with Bryn Mawr, and who had many preexisting misconceptions about all women’s colleges in general.

      When I announced to my family my decision to attend an all women’s liberal arts college my little cousin blurted out in a horrified voice “You mean your not going to get married?!?” As if: a) women who wend to all-women’s colleges don’t get married and b) not getting married was a fate worse than death for a young woman.

      Before I left to attend Bryn Mawr, a friend of a friend advised me, if I were unlucky enough to “get a lesbian” as a roommate, to tie her up with duct tape at night to make sure she didn’t attack me (presumably in a sexual fashion).

      When my boyfriend told his friends that he was dating a woman from Bryn Mawr, one of his friends replied: “Oh, I didn’t know you were a lesbian”. As if all Bryn Mawr women are homosexual, and if he were dating one, he must some how be a female lesbian as well. (This notion existing side-by-side in a sort of doublethink fashion to the idea that Bryn Mawr women are all sexually-starved straight girls who routinely troll coed campuses looking for willing men to share their beds at night– another preconceived notion of a Bryn Mawr woman I had to face as my boyfriend and I were involved in a cross-campus long term relationship)

      And about half-way through my education I had to explain to a family friend that, no, I was not going to a finishing school where they taught me the proper rules of etiquette, but rather to an incredibly rigorous academic institution where I was being intellectually challenged on a daily basis, broadening my horizons, and being empowered to change the world by both the faculty and my peers.

      You see, Tiger Momma, Here in the Bryn Mawr community we are used to having to defend our choice to attend an all women’s institution to people who are ignorant of its true purpose and identity. And most of the time we are able to keep our cool and explain calmly and rationally that: No, we are not all lesbians, yes, some of us are and we’re proud of providing those students with a safe space in which to express themselves. And yes, each and every one of us is dedicated to pushing her own academic limits, challenging the unsatisfactory status quo, and changing the world for the better.

      But when a member of our community- albiet a member who has moved on to a new community- but still someone we expect to understand this problem, and to know what Bryn Mawr is really about, makes insulting, degrading, and false statements about our school in a public forum, we feel angry, we feel insulted, and many of us (particularly those who, unlike me, knew Ms. Chu personally) feel betrayed by a fellow community member. That is why so many of us have reacted in anger- not always tempered by rational thought.

      You are right, some of the responses are concerning. But I do not believe that they are specific to all women’s colleges: I think that any close community faced with this sort of affront would respond with some insulting and abusive remarks. I think that the number of thoughtful and insightful comments ought to instead indicate the quality of the members of our community, not the lack thereof.

      I hope this helps you take some of the less-than-admirable posts in response to this article in a new perspective, with more understanding to the feelings that motivated such posts. And while this does not excuse inconsiderate and personal attacks, it does help to explain them.

      As far as your daughter’s college search (and not that I’m any sort of expert in this matter, but here’s my advice anyway): I would not judge any one type of institution (coed, all-women’s, liberal arts, technical institute, small, large, rural, urban) without visiting the specific institution in question: there is no better way to get a feel for a school than by walking around on its campus: observe the students, ask them about their college experience. Based on the way a school feels during these sorts of informal tours, your daughter will know which school is right for her.

      -Molly Pieri, BMC ’09

      • PB

        Well said, Molly! It is exactly this kind of constant demeaning and constant defending of our choices that I was referring to in my post.

        And as Molly says, yes, some of the comments here are ridiculous. But they come from a place of betrayal… and when you betray a small community that people are already quick to misjudge, that hurts more than when you betray the mainstream.

        I hope these comments, at least, have helped.

      • Tiger Momma

        Thank you for your candor and courage in saying this. As I wrote, some of the most thoughtful comments in this thread, including a few other responses to my post, have come from Bryn Mawr women. Posts like yours are making me a believer. [Posts that threaten career retaliation against Ms. Chu, not so much.] One person even suggested that I cannot relate to the feelings of an oppressed minority, but I am a racial minority (at least in the U.S.) and have felt the sting of prejudice. Even if you feel that your choices are under assault, in response may I encourage you and your peers to confidently and positively assert the value you see in your experiences at all-women’s schools without a trace of defensiveness. I would not intentionally “dampen the fire” in anyone’s soul, but I’m saddened that the overwhelming number of these comments to Ms. Chu’s piece offer more heat than light.

      • JL ’05

        Tiger Momma, I hope this article and the comments that follow do not sway your daughter’s choices. Sadly nearly any inflammatory article posted with an open comment forum will devolve into threats and petty insults. I would have expected more from my fellow alumnae, but these unsigned poorly written internet posts certainly do not reflect the women I have known, and may way be from random internet “trolls”.

        Never in my time at Bryn Mawr did I feel less smart or less capable than my co-ed peers. Penn professors were eager to have me in their classes; I was happy to be attending a tiny LAC and still have the option of taking graduate coursework as an undergrad.

        I did not arrive on campus a confident young scientist– but I certainly graduated as one. The academic and social environment at Bryn Mawr left me well prepared for my graduate studies, and I wouldn’t trade my experiences [wholly hygienic, I assure you] for the world.

      • Molly Pieri, BMC Class ’09

        “More heat than light” is a perfect way to describe many of the less well thought out posts seen here. Unfortunately, I think that such is the nature of the anonymous internet forum: more so because we cannot see hurt we cause people with our words… Hopefully I have shed some light by my own posts, and I feel terribly that you might be receiving some of the aforementioned heat for expressing your take on the situation in your post.Good luck to your daughter in her college search.

        -Molly, BMC ’09

    • Mliu

      I wonder if this concerned mother has considered the reaction of Ivy League students if a similar attack was launched on some aspect of their school, or really, of any student attending an institution of which they were proud. Whether it is a good trait or not, I have rarely encountered an academic who is not proud of her or his current or past educational institution enough to argue against those who wish to sling mud. I highly doubt the mass of these responses nor the anger voiced in them is unique to Bryn Mawr, Wellesley, or women’s colleges as a whole. Someone who feels that they have benefited greatly from her or his college experience and who hopes that others will be able to benefit from similar experiences will naturally jump to rectify publications that suggest untrue and frankly impressions of the college she or he holds so dear.

      While I have difficulty understanding how arguments against an insulting article “confirm Ms. Chu’s observations,” since Ms. Chu seems to mostly comment on Bryn Mawr women’s hygiene and need to scream loudly in public, not the ferocity with which they respond to negativity online, I honestly feel as if this would be the response of any highly accredited college or university’s students and alumni/ae. I truly do hope this mother leaves her daughter’s college decision up to her daughter, be it coed or women’s college, and I have the feeling that no matter which she eventually attends, there will be students who love the school and are willing to defend it.

    • BMC Student

      Dear Tiger Momma,

      Please imagine if every stereotype that could be said about whatever groups of people you belong to had just been put online, by someone claiming to have experienced being part of that group. That is what we, at Bryn Mawr, are now dealing with. And the students at Wellesly are dealing with being judged in the same way.

      What is hurting the students of Bryn Mawr – and yes, it does hurt – is not that Ms. Chu had a bad experience with Bryn Mawr, nor that she doesn’t believe in the value women’s colleges. Obviously we would disagree her assessments, but we would not begrudge her them. The fact is that being at a women’s college does create some difficulties and is not for everyone. That’s fine. But it is also not what Ms. Chu claims it is.

      The stereotypes she puts out are simply untrue. We do not always wear oversize sweatpants to class, in fact, I find that Bryn Mawr women dress very well. I have never seen a bloody tampon in our bathrooms – they are immaculate. There aren’t such whispers about professor-student relationships, at least not that I have ever heard. The males in our classes are just like the females in our classes – it’s really not that big of a deal when there are men from Haverford or Swarthmore there.

      So, before judging us as Ms. Chu so clearly did, I ask you to consider how you would feel if every stereotype that you have ever faced had just been presented to the world at large as fact. I am sure you are an intelligent woman with a lot to offer the world, one who takes pride in what she is doing and where she is doing it. How would you feel if someone did the same thing Ms. Chu has done to us, to you?

      I cannot defend some of the viciousness here, but in terms of “threats to her future employment” no one is threatening to make sure she doesn’t get a job. But it’s a simple fact that there are a lot of women in high powered positions who are Seven Sisters alumnae. It seems logical to me that Ms. Chu will probably feel the backlash of this article at some point in that manner.

      I urge you to consider the viciousness with which this article was written, as well, when you are judging the responses of those attacked.

      There is certainly a place in academic discussion for debate over the merits and disadvantages of single-sex education, or even the relevance of such institutions. That’s not what this article does. It simply lists stereotypes of Bryn Mawr women, and uses them to draw the conclusion that coed institutions are better.

    • Anonymous

      Excuse me, but you seem to be implying that you are willing to form your entire opinion on a large and diverse group of colleges based on one comments section on the internet (which appears to be largely unmoderated). Does that really constitute due diligence?

      Most graduates of liberal arts colleges are fiercely loyal to their schools. I assume that as an alumna of a liberal arts college, you know this. Women’s college graduates are no different. What’s more, we tend to be particularly loyal to our schools for two reasons: because we have, over the years, heard so many inaccurate and demeaning remarks directed at our alma maters (“Isn’t that a girls school?” and “Aren’t there a lot of lesbians there?”–as if that’s a drawback/something to be ashamed of, being the most common, but also assumptions that we must be oversensitive to jokes and/or unable to relate to men), and because we believe that we have gained something invaluable from our experience–that we have become better people and better women, that we have become more sensitive to injustices of all kinds, that we are not afraid to do what it takes to make our voices heard when necessary.

      It appears to me that your objection to women’s colleges is that their graduates are capable of getting angry on the internet. I assure you that 20-something graduates of every college in the US are capable of that. (I also assume that you are not researching other colleges in the same way.)

      Yes, there’s a lot of snark in the responses from the students and alumnae of women’s colleges. It’s also true that most of the responses come from young people, and that this is an internet forum. Frankly, I’d say that the comments here have more substance to them than most internet comment sections (have you ever read the comments at, say, the Washington Post?), even if they are no less snarky. On the internet, people are more free to vent the full extent of their frustration, whereas in person most of us work hard to respond politely (though firmly) to ill-informed remarks about our schools. I would hope that a parent about to guide her daughter through the infinitely complex process of choosing a college would filter information and sources enough to keep that in mind.

      For your daughter’s sake, I would suggest that you go to a “preview party” in your area hosted by one of the major women’s colleges. They happen in November and December in most major cities, precisely so that perspective students and their families can get a sense of what women’s colleges are really like. At a preview party, you would meet real people face to face, both current students and alumnae. That would give you–and your daughter–some far more comparable information to go by. There’s a broad range of women’s colleges out there–the experiences of my friends who went to Bryn Mawr, Wellesley, and Spellman are in some respects quite different from my experiences at Smith. Not to mention Smith can be a almost a different school depending where on campus you live and who you socialize with (just like almost every college I’ve ever heard of).

      Smith College 2008

  • BMC’14

    I myself have*. Sorry about the typo

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