We’ve all heard the story by now: the Butterfield colleges flooded a few days before classes started, everyone had to evacuate and spend the night in the field house, people had their stuff ruined, and, basically, it sucked. As a Butts resident myself, I can confidently say that anytime I tell someone where I live on campus, I’m met with an extreme yet genuine look of pity and a sympathetic “Oh, I’m so sorry.”

But what are you all so sorry about? 

Sure, the whole flood thing happened, we have four floors but not a single elevator, no air conditioning except for on the first floor, and constantly have plumbing and sewage issues so we can’t take showers sometimes… but other than that, we’re fine! So, stop feeling bad for us. In fact, you should be jealous. I can confirm that the Butts are in fact a fabulous place to live.

First, we have the Butthole. I mean, come on, it’s called the Butthole! Isn’t that hilarious? Peak college humor right there. And if we’re being honest, the little lawn area and the picnic tables are a very convenient place for doing homework outside, eating lunch, or playing some Spikeball. The area is usually pretty populated, meaning that you can almost always spot a friend or two to chat with on your way back to your dorm. (This feels pretty cool; it’s like I’m the popular girl from a movie who is super social and friends with everyone).

And for all the non-athlete freshmen like myself who don’t get invited to campus parties, the Butthole has also proven itself to be the place to be on Friday and Saturday nights. We all kind of just congregate there (specifically by the Butts C staircase), and stand outside talking for hours. 

Summerfields (or Summies, if we’re being hip about it), our on-site dining option, is also unjustly underrated. Sure, sometimes it gives you “Summies Tummy,” but if you avoid the late-night Pound of Wings, Summerfields actually serves some tasty diner-esque cuisine. There’s also the incredible convenience of the one late-night option on campus being two steps away from your dorm. I’ll be honest, I think it’s time for me to cut back on the midnight quesadillas.

 And as much as communal bathrooms are part of the dorm-living experience, the gender-neutral single-occupancy bathrooms in the Butts are a nice perk (even though they are pretty wet and gross most of the time). I have had multiple conversations with my neighbors discussing how great it is to be able to lock yourself in the bathroom and have the shower and sink all to yourself for a while—no need to worry about flashing anyone!

Even though I thought the Wesleyan website was kidding when they said that the Butterfield Colleges “form a self-sufficient community,” they’re not totally wrong. We have pretty much everything. I admit that the relatively far walk to Usdan every morning for breakfast isn’t the best, but we manage. It’s almost like all the hardships of living here—the dysfunctional washing machines, the prison-like decor—connect the Butterfield community on a deeper level: we’re all in this together, after all.

So Wesleyan, please stop feeling bad for us. We (the majority of us, at least) are happy where we are. I may or may not be biased, but the Butts houses some of the coolest people on campus. That’s probably why so many of you make the trek all the way from your centrally-located dorms to come hang out with us. And, anyway, we all know you guys are jealous of our pool table.

Sofia Sarak can be reached at ssarak@wesleyan.edu.