Over the past few months, I’ve been acting in “The MonoLogOn,” a series of eight student-written monologues based on the theme of “the masks we wear.” The production was created by Anna Tjeltveit ’23 and Jaydie Halperin ’23 and will be live streamed on YouTube on Oct. 23 and Oct. 24 at 7 p.m. Each monologue was produced by a group, consisting of a writer, director, and actor, tasked with devising a storyline and building it into a full piece. The performances will feature original music by Wesleyan students in between each monologue.

Although I’m deferring to the spring semester, I was eager to get involved in events happening at the University this fall. The last time I performed was in mid-February right before everything shut down, so I was itching to act again. I also missed the communal feeling that comes with being in a show with a close-knit cast and crew. I have a lot of in-person theater experience, but I had never done theater on Zoom, especially not from my house. When I heard about “The MonoLogOn,” I was eager to discover how I could apply what I’ve learned in my previous theater experiences to this unusual circumstance.

When I went to the interest meeting for “The MonoLogOn” on Sept. 9, I was struck by its inclusive environment. Tjeltveit and Halperin gave us an open invitation to experiment and try new things in a safe and welcoming space. At the very first meeting I could see a community starting to come together. From there, the camaraderie grew, not only within my individual group as we collaborated, but in the full company during the rehearsals that followed.

The two people in my group are Sadie Goldstein ’24 and Danielle Nodelman’ 24. When I asked them why they chose to take part in “The MonoLogOn,” Goldstein, my group’s writer, explained how even though this was her first time writing a piece to be performed, she was excited by the open-ended prompt and the ability to write about what moved her.

“There was a lot more freedom for me to write what I want to write,” Goldstein said.

Nodelman, my group’s director, was not only eager to figure out how to direct over Zoom and learn from Tjeltveit and Halperin, but also excited to share this experience with people who weren’t on campus yet.

“It’s been great to work with you and be able to share this experience together,” Nodelman said.

Both Nodelman and Goldstein also spoke to how their experience with acting informed their approach to their writer/director roles.

I was looking forward to exploring the different choices I could make as an actor that could help tell a story to people miles away from me. In the beginning, I was both excited and nervous. Normally, I’m handed a script and told what to do. But for this project, we were the ones in charge of pretty much everything.

 The biggest question in my mind was “What can I do within the confines of the infamous Zoombox?” At first, I thought I would sit at my desk and recite the monologue, using as many facial expressions and tones as I could to convey the story. But over the course of the last two months, with guidance from Tjeltveit, Halperin, and my group, I learned how to challenge the supposed limits of the digital rectangle.

In the acting workshop, for example, we played with our relationship to the camera and how external factors can influence that relationship. What would it be like to start the monologue in the dark? Does it make sense to move the camera around like we’re vlogging? How can we enter and exit the frame?

Nodelman did a lot of the same exercises as I in her directing workshop.

In their workshop, however, the writers listened to several different monologues to inspire their own writing. Goldstein described how “The MonoLogOn” leaders showed the variety of possibilities for a monologue, removing the confines of the traditional monologue in which someone rambles for an extended amount of time about their thoughts. Monologues instead could be fiercely researched arguments, folktales, or even abstract representations of multiple people.

In our first few meetings, my group and I talked through a host of potential ideas. Since music is a big part of my life, we decided to base our monologue on specific songs that capture an extreme take on a girl feeling out of place and trying to fit in. Some of these songs included selections from “Phantom of the Opera,” “Facade” from “Jekyll and Hyde,” and “Imposter Syndrome” by Sidney Gish. During the brainstorming process, Goldstein asked me about what roles I’ve played as well as what characters I wanted to explore. After she finished drafting the monologue, Nodelman and I went through it. Together we figured out resonant moments we wanted to highlight and established some broad stage directions. Other than that, I was given the freedom to make my own choices.

Initially, it took awhile for me to jump into the mind of my character and thoroughly figure her out. I asked myself questions like “How does this character react to different situations? How does she interact with the world around her? How does she view herself?” Finding ways to convey my character’s extreme emotion but also intimidation was a difficult but rewarding task.

Throughout the monologue itself, my character exudes a lot of frantic energy. At times it was a challenge to balance that energy with the hopefulness and desperation that she experiences. Sometimes, while working with my group, there would be too much frenzy and at other times not enough. But as I continued to live in my character, practice the monologue and get feedback from my group, I came to discover the right balance.

In addition to having my group as a sounding board, the full company rehearsals created a space in which all 27 of us could connect and work together. Every Tuesday night, the full company rehearsed. The meetings would start off with a fun and sometimes silly check in, like “What is your brain made up of today?” You had to do jazz hands to answer. Later we would play classic improv games like “Zip Zap Zop” to get the cast focused and playing off one another. Since this game is primarily based on eye contact, I never thought it would be possible to play over Zoom, yet we made it work. These activities helped everyone connect and made us feel like the production was one big group effort, rather than eight individual monologues.

We would then go into breakout rooms with one or two other groups. This time with individual teams was really helpful to talk about our ideas, run through materials, and exchange feedback. One group chose to depict the camera as a person, focusing on the intense relationship between the actor and the camera. Another group chose to have the camera be a silent observer while the actor moved in and out of the frame. My group brought some movement into the performance by having me carry the camera while moving around my acting space.

I sat down for an interview with the two creators and coordinators, Tjeltveit and Halperin, to talk about their vision for “The MonoLogOn.” They said that they really wanted to create a low-pressure environment where anyone could participate in collaborative theater.

Given the pandemic, we’ve all had to reinvent how we interact with the world around us and continue to do the things we love in a manner that keeps us all safe. Tjeltveit and Halperin mentioned how over the summer they had to come up with new ways of doing theater on campus. They soon settled on monologues as a powerful medium that could be performed by anyone anywhere in the world, socially distanced and within the confines of their own home.

“Having people not on campus be part of a community is so important and making sure they are still a part of Wesleyan, even though they can’t be here,” Halperin said.

 As their idea took shape, the co-creators needed a theme that a wide audience could identify with, and the current situation became their inspiration. COVID-19 has affected everyone on a global scale, and wearing facemasks has become vital. On the other hand, sitting across from someone, talking and watching the play of emotions on their face, is such a rich part of the social experience. So how do you have a meaningful interaction with someone when you are unable to see their full face? Do people live behind masks even when they are not wearing one? Do people have masks on even though we cannot see them? As a monologue topic, this could be interpreted in many different ways. As Tjeltveit and Halperin explored this idea further, their excitement grew.

I was also able to chat with two fellow members, Maren Westgard ’22 and Isabelle Chirls ’23, about what they thought of “The MonoLogOn” and their creative processes.

Since both Westgard and I are the actors in our respective groups, we bonded over how unique this experience is.

“It’s definitely weird to know the audience is there, but not feel like the audience is there, because it almost still feels like a rehearsal, even when you know you’re performing,” Westgard said.

Chirls, both the writer and director of her group, detailed how she and Westgard worked together to brainstorm ideas and refine the written piece.

“A lot of people believe that writing is an isolating process, and in some ways it is, but especially with writing for theater, writing can’t be a solitary process,” Chirls said.

She added that because the written words are not going to stay on the page but will be spoken out to an audience, it is important that actors collaborate with the people around them. I had a similar experience with my own group.

Overall, “The MonoLogOn” has been an incredibly positive experience for me. Although this show consists of eight separate monologues, we had a strong sense of togetherness as a company. I saw the community aspect that Tjeltveit and Halperin spoke of at every meeting, even during the long hours of technology rehearsals. When we watched every piece for the first time, it was amazing to see how vastly different pieces could all connect and flow together. 

“The magic that can happen when people from different backgrounds come together and collaborate creatively towards a common vision has been really moving for me,” Tjeltveit said.

“The MonoLogOn Production” opens this Friday at 7 p.m. The YouTube link for the performance is available through the production’s Facebook event page. 

 

Note: Anna Tjeltveit ’23 is a Copy Editor at The Argus. 

Sabrina Ladiwala can be reached at sladiwala@wesleyan.edu.