Spring Fling Wishes

, by Jessica Jordan, Arts Editor

We’re all tired of waiting for Spring Fling’s headlining acts to be announced, and we here at Argus Arts don’t have inside knowledge. Instead, we’re writing a facetious article about the bands we wish would play.

Jape

Wesleyan kids will dig this band because no one’s ever heard of them. This Irish electronic-rock group is fairly well known in the U.K., snagging Irish Album of the Year for 2009’s Ritual. But the closest they’ve come to fame here in the U.S. is having one song in the ninth episode of the second season of “Skins,” a British show that’s building a following here in the United States. As far as I know, they’ve never played a show in the United States, so why not start here? Check out the video for “Floating.” That song is all about drugs. It would be awesome.

Coconut Records

Jason Schwartzman is hands down the sexiest Jew alive (sorry, AEPi). He’s a damn fine actor, Wes Anderson thinks he’s cool, his sophomore HBO comedy “Bored to Death” is funnier than anything else currently on TV (yes, I’m willing to admit that this includes personal favorites “Modern Family” and “30 Rock”), and his musical project Coconut Records is the most interesting [insert pretentious genre defining hyphenated title] to hit the music scene in years. Those jams are just great. Plus Schwartzman can grow one hell of a moustache.

Wesleyan Gamelan

That’d show all ya’ll.

Elf Power

True old school Indie Rock, these guys released their first EP, “The Winter Hawk,” in 1995. As far as I can tell, they have undeservedly never received any mainstream success, or even much underground adoration. They released their ninth studio album in 2008, but really I just want to hear them play 1997’s “When The Red King Comes,” a concept album about the kingdom of a mythical Red King, in its entirety. Brian Eno wrote a song for them (“Needles in the Camel’s Eye”). They’re totally legit.

Two Gallants

I’m from Tennessee, and I would be remiss if I didn’t disclose to you my almost obscene affection for bluegrass and folk music. Plus, folk-rock group Two Gallants from San Francisco, Calif., actually seem like the one act on this list Wesleyan might be able to afford. I’m all for hip-hop and indie rock, but at the end of the day, the type of music I really want to listen to while sitting on Foss Hill on a spring afternoon is something more laid back and much more down home. Maybe one of these days.

  • dee

    First of all, Jason Schwartzman isn’t even Jewish, because obviously, his mother isn’t Jewish (she’s Talia Shire, Francis Ford Coppola’s sister).

    Second, there are so many better looking and sexier actors out there who are actually, fuly, Jewish, like Paul Rudd, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Logan Lerman, etc.

    If you like half-Jews, there’s James Franco.

Twitter