Thursday, July 24, 2025



Universal Laws of Internet Porn Relativity

(This is an addendum to my Wespeak, “Congratulations, Vol. 2: Demerits“)

1. The act of theorizing a sexual act or fetish creates a website dedicated to that sexual act or fetish.

a. If it is possible to theorize a sexual act or fetish, then said sexual act or fetish exists on the Internet

2. It need not be possible to theorize a sexual act or fetish for an anime porn site to exist that is dedicated to it.

3. There is a porn film dedicated to any blockbuster movie.

a. The closer the blockbuster movie moves towards the anime/sci-fi/fantasy genres, the more porn films will be dedicated to it.

4. The act of theorizing an object being inserted into a vagina/anus creates a website dedicated tyo the insertion of said object into a vagina/anus.

a. If an object can be theorized going into a vagina/anus, then a website exists wherein said object is then inserted into a mouth.

5. The act of theorizing two animals having sex creates a website wherein two humans dressed as said animals engage in sexual acts.

Comments

2 responses to “Universal Laws of Internet Porn Relativity”

  1.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    Huh.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

The Wesleyan Argus

Since 1868: The United States’ Oldest Twice-Weekly College Paper

© The Wesleyan Argus