If you’re anything like Dill and Doe, you have probably taken a love languages quiz on the internet or maybe even read “The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman. (If not, though, that’s okay! Chapman is infamously homophobic, so take his words critically.) If you are unfamiliar, the five love languages are as follows: quality […]
I have always known I would work throughout college. The days of using my parents’ money to go out for lunch with my friends or buy a new sweater would be over. Living 50 minutes from my high school and keeping up with a constant stream of homework, volunteering, school newspaper, and so on, I […]
When I first read, “I Hate Good People: Why We Should Stop Pairing Morality and Identity,” the provocative title certainly drew my attention—not by stirring the ire of your average reader of The Argus, but by novelly expressing belief in and philosophy of the basic nature of the so-called intelligent inhabitants of this planet. What the writer posits is very clearly […]
If you’ve never visited Craigslist before, you should know that it’s a place you need to go to with a mission. It’s an online marketplace, similar to eBay or Facebook marketplace, but without the polished commercialism. Founded in 1995, it is one of the earliest hosts of Internet communities. The creator, Craig Newmark, a self-proclaimed […]
The other night I was complaining to Doe about all my classic issues. One of them being: why are there no single, attractive, straight guys crossing my path? Are my standards too high? If any of you are fiending after your rom-com moment like I am, then I’m sure you recognize these thought loops. But mid-pity […]
Editor’s note on April 29, 2024: This article is a work of satire. Most of the content is fabricated and/or exaggerated for purposes of entertainment. It was Thursday night, and I was dressed like a cheap and salacious homosexual. Rumors circulated that the bouncers had new ID screening technology. In line, I overheard an underclassman […]
Recently, the Queen Sofía National Museum Art Centre in Madrid, Spain, has started allowing visitors to photograph Pablo Picasso’s “Guernica,” arguing that it would make the exhibit more accessible and “enhance the experience of viewing the painting.” But whether or not this is a positive update remains to be seen. Whenever I go to a museum, […]
I hate good people. Have you ever met one? I sincerely hope not. Quite frankly, good people are some of my least favorite inhabitants of our little planet. When I’m in a particularly bad—or maybe just clear—mood, I would honestly prefer a bad person to a good one. Though I can’t say I enjoy either. […]
Perhaps you can remember this year’s Oscars: the plethora of titles (deservingly) awarded to “Everything, Everywhere, All At Once,” a selection of red carpet looks that ranged from glamorous to unintentionally camp, and a scintillating performance of the winner of the Best Original Song category, “Naatu Naatu,” from the Telugu language film“RRR.” And if you are […]
“Wokeness” is a term that has become popularized and defined by current politicians. The term originally derives from African American Vernacular English (AAVE) and has historically been used by members of Black communities to remind each other to stay aware of racial injustice in the United States. Since around 2020, however, the term has been […]