In this paper’s ink over the past month, students have described feelings of weariness, during election discussions, in dramatic performances, at parties—even the groundhogs have gone quiet. In the dimming winter light, it can feel like we’ve lost the knack for celebration.

That’s why this week’s issue of the Argives, a retrospective column on The Argus’ archival issues, turns back to Thanksgivings of years past.

“Thanksgiving—the word alone conjures up happy visions of golden turkeys, mounds of stuffing, and grandparents, and indeed this was the scene in many traditional households,” then-Staff Writer Josh Arthurs ’97 wrote in this paper on Nov. 29, 1995. “But while most Wesleyan students left Middletown for the warmth of the familial hearth, there remained a hardy band of marooned students here on campus.”

’Twas the season, however, and on Thanksgiving Day, then-Director of Alumni Programs John Driscoll served a turkey dinner for remaining students at Downey House, Arthurs wrote.

“This year, we had around 30 people, and they ate us out of house and home,” Driscoll said. 

Arthurs wrote that the dinner included only two turkeys—of “surprisingly good” quality according to a student in attendance—so one must question both the size of 20th century birds and administrators’ salaries.

“If people weren’t having a good time, they certainly did a good job of hiding it,” Driscoll cheerily concluded.

Of course, if students were looking for a real good time, they needn’t look far: A few pages after Arthurs’ heartwarming tale in the 1995 issue, Metro Spirits advertised a 30 pack of Miller’s Lite for a wonderfully affordable $11.99.

“Don’t forget!” the advertisement read. “There’s always a discount on kegs for Wesleyan Students.”

This reporter regrets to inform readers that the same pack of Miller’s will now cost you $30, and the aforementioned perpetual discount on collegiate kegs no longer exists.

The familial hearth Arthurs described, however, wasn’t always that warm. In The Argus’ humor section, The Ampersand, an unattributed piece showcased the wit of the Ampersand Editors, including Abe Forman-Greenwald ’98—now an Emmy-nominated producer of the Netflix series “Big Mouth”—Tony-award winner Thomas Kail ’99, and (also) Tony-award winner Anthony Veneziale ’98.

“An Ideal Thanksgiving: If I didn’t spill cranberry sauce all over my Aunt’s new dress,” someone wrote. “My Actual Thanksgiving: I spilled cranberry sauce all over my Aunt’s new dress.”

The antics only escalated from there. 

“An Ideal Thanksgiving: If it was a nice Norman Rockwell-esque portrait of a happy, healthy, hearty family dinner,” someone wrote. “My Actual Thanksgiving: Was a somewhat frightening Simpsons-esque portrait of a dysfunctional family. My Dad tried to choke me after he saw my nose ring, but I wouldn’t succumb to his over-the-hill grip. We ended up on the table rolling around in the dark meat. I hate dark meat.”

More than food and family, however, University writers have spent most of their time protesting for a longer break, since as far back as 1885.

“Those of our number who spent that day at home were glad of the fact that college closed at noon on Wednesday, instead of at night, as heretofore,” an unattributed piece declared on Dec. 2. “This is a move in the right direction, and as such is a cause for thanksgiving. Next year it is to be hoped we shall have a half holiday on the Monday after Thanksgiving…. [O]nly half a day of college work would be lost, while a day and a half would be added to the first and pleasantest vacation in the college. This is the kind of arithmetical calculation that we should like to see worked out.”

University chaps could still have their fun in Middletown, another unknown author attested on another page in the issue.

“Those boys that remained had a most excellent time,” the piece read. “The numerous calls that were made at the druggists that night for ‘anti-belliake’ tells the tale better than words can.”

By 1914, however, students celebrated an extra vacation day on the Friday after Thanksgiving. 

“The petition has succeeded; the faculty have seen fit to return the Friday following Thanksgiving to the vacation period,” an unattributed author wrote on Nov. 19. “For the present year we are safe; but how about the future? While the faculty have kindly acceded to our wishes this year, we fear for the Thanksgivings of the future.”

In 1946, in yet another piece titled “Thanksgiving Recess,” that fear became reality.

“We wonder, along with most undergraduates, why there can not be more than one day of recess for Thanksgiving,” an unattributed author wrote on Oct. 10. “During the war, when the college was under an accelerated program, one day seemed fair and adequate. Adequacy was based on necessity. Now, however, with the college under a normal program, it would seem possible that a genuine ‘long weekend’ be scheduled.”

Freedom has its cost.

Well, ungrateful liberals aside, The Argus archives’ true joy lies with the wealth of student life that used to exist in newspapers.

In the Nov. 11, 1983 issue, students looking for rides home turned to The Argus’ classified section.

“Going to Boston area on Wednesday, Nov. 23?” Beth at extension x8601 wrote. “Please take me with you—at this point I’m walking home!”

Students promised to share all “the usuals” (gas money, driving time), and others offered their tapes, snacks, or “political gripes.”

“At Wes for Thanksgiving?” Steve (“The Fish Hotline”) at extension x6369 wrote. “Please feed my fish or they’ll be a-floating while I’ll be a-bloating.”

How I long for a pre-internet world.

Turkey, Tofu, and Pavito

No Thanksgiving piece is complete without saccharine descriptions of dinner.

In the Nov. 11, 2011 issue, then-Foreign Food Correspondent Cordelia Hyland ’13 wrote about her Thanksgiving in Sunsoaked Buenos Aires.

“In a turkey-less country, how are we going to do Thanksgiving the right way?” Hyland wrote. “With a whole lot of substitution, apparently. We have been assured that although there are no turkeys to be found, ‘pavito’ is basically the same thing. I’m slightly suspicious, since no one seems able to tell me the English name, and when I ran a Google search of ‘pavito,’ all I got were pictures of ladies’ bottoms and a few peacocks.”

Ooh la la!

This reporter regrets to inform readers that a 2024 Google search of “pavito” returns nothing but pictures of branded tequila.

For then-Food Editor Aviva Markowitz ’12, there was no right way to do Thanksgiving dinner. In an article sacrilegiously titled “Beyond Turkey: Tofu Pot Pie,” Markowtiz introduced the tofu pot pie. 

Eat, rejoice, weary no longer—and write for The Argus. Who knows, you might see yourself in a reprint 139 years later.

Thomas Lyons can be reached at trlyons@wesleyan.edu.

“From the Argives” is a column that explores The Argus’ archives (Argives) and any interesting, topical, poignant, or comical stories that have been published in the past. Given The Argus’ long history on campus and the ever-shifting viewpoints of its student body, the material, subject matter, and perspectives expressed in the archived article may be insensitive or outdated, and do not reflect the views of any current member of The Argus. If you have any questions about the original article or its publication, please contact Head Archivists Sida Chu at schu@wesleyan.edu and Maggie Smith at mssmith@wesleyan.edu.