The Argus reserves the right to withhold anonymous Letters to the Editor and makes decisions about publication on a case-by-case basis.

Recently, I came across an article circulating social media entitled The Misandry Problem; naturally, I felt compelled to read this piece and see if it had any substance to it. What I found was a puzzling narrative which, in my opinion, had no true backbone behind it.

I think at the very core of this article, the narrative is derived from skewed opinions based on misunderstandings in a group setting. This article struggles to really give concrete examples of misandry at Wesleyan, which is critical for this article to be taken seriously in any capacity. In all honesty, this article probably had very little chance to succeed due to the nature of the stance that the article took and the way it was presented. In my opinion, this article felt like an open letter written by an individual who had personal issues with their friends.

However, I want to take this moment to give another male perspective on the matter. I don’t mean to dismiss his feelings, but I find misandry to be an incorrect characterization of the issues brought up in the article. The issues brought up, such as “what would a man do?” or wearing a certain Halloween costume, or being asked to carry laundry, while obviously trivial, are also a jest at the structure of a patriarchal society. The issue of Palestinian women and children being highlighted in the Israeli bombings are meant as a call to action for men to do the right thing; not to diminish the loss of Palestinian men, and certainly not to highlight Palestinian men as terrorists. The issues mentioned are how a patriarchal society negatively affects the lives of men. I had hoped the issue would be brought up gracefully, similar to Greta Gertwig’s Barbie; instead, the article presented these issues with the elegance of Homer Simpson’s makeup shotgun.

I took the liberty of releasing a survey prior to writing this article; it asked for the person’s gender, whether they thought men were socially ostracized at Wesleyan (and space to elaborate if they felt, as well as space to vent their thoughts on the situation), and consent to publish data from the survey. My results followed my suspicions, yielding 48 responses; 23 were men, 19 were women, 3 were non-binary and 2 left it anonymous. Out of the 48 responses, 45 responded “No” to if men were socially ostracized at Wesleyan.

I want to discuss a response in the open-ended section, written by an individual who agreed that Wesleyan had a misandry issue, “Please do not share my name if this is published. I find that the majority of girls at Wesleyan are feminists to an extreme level. They want access to abortion, equality of trans people in sports and anytime a problem occurs they run to blame rich white men for it. I worry that if I disagree with them then I won’t be able to make friends… We have more programs for women that exclude men than majority of schools and have people who actively work to destroy mens only spaces like DKE. Wesleyan attempts to create equality by pushing down men instead of encouraging everyone. They attempt to create equality and equity at the expense of bringing down others.”

This response covers a lot of what I wished the original article went over; while I disagree with the conclusion that Wesleyan has a misandry issue, I understand certain arguments made about Wesleyan somewhat pushing down their male student body for the gain of Wesleyan women. I think the Wesleyan body is certainly much more progressive than a typical real-world setting, but the small grievances that we men experience at Wesleyan are nothing compared to what our non-male peers have to go through. Early after the assault incident back in September, several of my female friends requested I walk them back to their dorm just so that they felt more comfortable on their journey back. Who are we, as men, to complain about how we can’t wear a specific Halloween costume. How can we, as men, have the audacity to complain about being objectified in any way?

Going back to the letter, I have a particular quote that I feel summarizes this article’s issues; “Something can’t just be misandrist, it has to be misogynistic, racist, or transphobic to have any serious discussion. In fact, it’s best to ignore when something is misandrist. Bigotry is just ignored if it’s directed towards men, it’s seen as an unserious issue made up by whiny men that can’t take a joke.” Pushing aside the passive self-awareness in this passage, I find this part of the letter to be the most paradoxical. A response in the survey previously mentioned struck a chord with me; “Saying there’s misandry anywhere is like saying reverse racism is a problem. Sociologically impossible!” This is ultimately the main issue with this paper; bigotry in any form requires a major power dynamic where the oppressors stand head and shoulders above the oppressed. I’m not saying that misandry doesn’t exist at all, nor am I saying that men aren’t affected by any kind of prejudice. But the idea of a cis, white male complaining about his lack of fair treatment is completely and utterly hilarious. We’ve already had a public case of a girl here being assaulted in the dead of night, and there are numerous individuals here who have been victims of sexual assault and worse. Being made fun of for having XY chromosomes is hardly an issue at all here at Wesleyan, let alone a major pressing issue that needs to be addressed. There is no hostile environment shrouding Wesleyan for men, and men are certainly not a major statistical minority that are constantly at risk of being oppressed. This issue is not real; at least, not compared to the other issues at Wesleyan (bathroom hand towels, anyone?).

From here, we move on to greener pastures; I genuinely hope that the author’s misplaced letter can be used as a warning for anyone having issues with their friends. I implore you to communicate with your peers if you have any kind of problem with their treatment of you, whether it be motivated by factors out of your control or because of something you did. Sometimes, our issues can be as simple as just not understanding our dry sense of humor. But I beg of anyone who reads this to not submit a manifesto to the editor for the world to see your insecurity laid bare. The only thing accomplished is creating a mess out of a seemingly harmless mishap.