The University’s Office of Health Education, WesWell, hosted its annual Sexual Health Week from April 20-24. For the final event, WesWell held a workshop titled “Sex Toys and Kink,” which was co-sponsored by WesKink, a student group for anyone interested in kink, BDSM, non-monogamy and polyamory, and other alternative sex or relationship practices.
According to its website, WesWell aims to maintain the overall health and well-being of University students. An anonymous member of WesKink who helped to organize this workshop elaborated on the mission and purpose of the group.
“WesKink is a student group where we talk about kink, polyamory, sexuality, any non-normative sexual stuff that isn’t LGBT,” the student said. “A lot of its goals is creating a comfortable environment to talk about stuff that can be really stigmatized and to educate people outside of the group while creating a community of people on campus who can discuss things that they’re into.”
Throughout the event, organizers held educational and informative open discussions regarding various sex toys and other accessories, how to enjoy them, and also a variety of safe practices, especially related to kink.
The many students who attended the workshops came for a variety of reasons. Brenda Quintana ’18 attended with the intention of learning more about a topic that she finds people do not often feel comfortable addressing.
“I’ve been wanting to come to all the different events that WesWell has been putting on,” Quintana said. “I’ve been to most of them and I think this one is the most interesting because there’s not a lot of dialogue about sex toys and kinks and stuff on campus.”
Several other students agreed that the workshop created a relaxed and open environment. Individuals felt that the workshop allowed them to learn and ask questions. Quintana elaborated on the ways in which she felt that she benefited from the event.
“I learned a lot of things,” she said. “I think that what was helpful about this was this isn’t me looking up things online, it’s hard to know the right kind of questions to ask and so having some people who are very well-educated about it and jumping ahead and answering the questions that you didn’t think you had is very helpful to me.”
Other students expressed that the stigma surrounding the topic of sex and kink makes it a difficult topic for students to find answers to and to further explore. David Lopez-Wade ’18 said that he appreciated the sophistication with which the conversation was conducted.
“When I was in high school, I participated in sex talks and sex education,” Lopez-Wade said. “It was a very kind of awkward, like, ‘Oh my god, he said penis.’ But here in a college environment, people are mature and more open to talk about it.”
Nate Ko ’18 considered the discussion a valuable experience.
“Having a knowledgeable expert here to answer things that I didn’t know previously or would otherwise feel awkward asking is helpful,” he said. WesWell Intern and WesKink member Kimberly Berry ’15 led the discussion, keeping all attendees entertained throughout the workshop.
“[The goal of the discussion was] to learn new things things that they didn’t know or didn’t think about before,” Berry said. “Everyone seemed really engaged and happy and playful with the toys. There were a lot of interesting questions which means that people learned.”
Several members of WesKink added that they had similar goals in terms of the impact they each hoped to have on the community. The anonymous student spoke to these goals.
“I just want people to have a larger vocabulary for what they want sexually and to feel more comfortable communicating that,” the student said.
Berry elaborated on the goal of this workshop.
“I want them to not stigmatize kink and to just have general knowledge of sex toys and how to use them properly, when to clean them, and what different toys you can use,” Berry said. “Sex is fun!”
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