1. Lebron James’ face will be everywhere — For better or for worse, Bron Bron has become the poster boy for the NBA. Expect to see his mug on TNT promos, Sprite billboard ads, and maybe even grafted onto a few NBA-issued basketballs. Jerry West better watch out or the NBA might swap his image on their current logo for a shot of King James (sidenote: this is the worst nickname in NBA history).

Also, expect LeBron to have another disappointing post-season. For all the praise has received, LeBron has yet to win a banner, and he won’t in Cleveland.

I can’t wait to hear Jay-Z, partial owner of the soon-to-be Brooklyn Nets and one of LeBron’s closest confidants, sample a Biggie sound bite when the Nets sign LeBron after this season. Can’t you hear New York’s newest arena blasting, “we did it Brooklyn, we did it!” as LeBron takes the floor in 2010?

2. Isiah Thomas will be sorely missed at MSG. No joke. Until they send selfish ballers like Zach Randolf, Stephon Marbury, AND Eddie Curry back to Rucker Park to learn that a basketball team is made up of five players, the Knicks are going to have bad seasons. At least Isiah gave the fans and media something to rally against; he was a polarizing figure whose dapper dress, outrageous comments, and impossible smugness have defined the NBA’s marquee team for years. Maybe Isiah never learned how to transition from player to coach, but the team will be put on the NBA’s backburner in the absence of his antics and personality.

3. Boston will repeat. Now I sound like your average New England sports fan, but I’m not: I’m from D.C., so back off. The Boston Three-Party will not let up in 2008-09. I will forever have faith in Ray Allen because he IS Jesus Shuttlesworth. Paul Pierce is so confident that he just dubbed himself the best player in the NBA, and any team that has a player (Kevin Garnett) who viciously bangs his own head against the base of the basketball hoop before games has to be motivated. Boston makes it 18 titles.

4. The Oklahoma City Thunder will be forgotten. It was sad to say goodbye to the Seattle Supersonics. It’s much sadder to look at the teams new jerseys and logo. Does Oklahoma City even have a basketball fan base? The worst part of this move is that superstar in the making forward Kevin Durant will be forgotten as well. I think KD will take over the league, but not until he gets away from the Thunder.

5. The Sun will have their final rise. Grant Hill (36), Shaq (36), and Steve Nash (34) will look at each other and finally realize this season is their last chance at a title. If these three geriatrics can pull it together, think the 2007-08 Celts all over again; Phoenix Three-Party doesn’t really work though.

6. Barkley vs. Caliendo. Charles Barkley will do an impersonation of comic-impersonator Frank Caliendo that brings the house down and consequently ends Caliendo’s career—I hope.

7. Dirk the Softie. Dallas Mavericks’ forward Dirk Nowitzki has made a career out of dancing in the lane like Fred Astaire and shooting threes. When Shaq finally flattens Dirk in the paint and his three-point percentage drops to below 20, Dirk will be dubbed the biggest pansy in the NBA, just surpassing the retired Shawn Bradley.

8. Craig Sager will finally earn the nickname, “the Liberace of sideline analysis.” ’Nuff said.