It is not everyday that a person gets to sit down and have a chat with a college football legend. I was lucky enough to have that opportunity this weekend. Unbeknownst to many, Wesleyan has been the stomping grounds to the greatest living quarterback the state of Vermont ever produced on May 1, 1982. It was a dream come true for me to be able to even get an audience with this gridiron hero. Nervously I approached his door, not knowing what to say or how to act. I was about to enter the domain of the best thing to happen to Wesleyan since the invention of useless glass structures: Brennan Carney, ’04.

As I opened the door, I saw a king sitting upon his throne, ready to dispense his wisdom to all who might be within listening range. Carney was anxious to speak to me, which I found surprising. One might expect Carney to be speaking to the British Royal Family about the unbelievable taste of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream and yet here he was, offering me his precious time. I humbly thanked him for agreeing to meet with me and he offered me a seat in a chair adjacent to his plush futon. We made small talk for a few minutes then I decided that it was time to delve into the psyche of the man who once led the Wesleyan football team to unthinkable, dizzying heights.

But what do you ask a man who once rushed for negative 12 yards in one season from the quarterback position? I could list the statistics that Carney piled up over his time as Wesleyan’s version of Joe Montano, John Elway, and Michael Vick all rolled into one uber-human. But that would just be trite. The records will stand the test of time, of that I am certain. Carney’s existence is more than just football. He is a Renaissance man for the new millennium. As I would soon find out, even though his football career is over, he still has a purpose on this planet. This piece of information fascinated me, as I was convinced that as a football demi-god, he would be unable to step away from the limelight that has so vividly depicted his travails over the past four years. I made the mistake of linking being retired to being dead. Instead I learned that being retired opens up a whole new world for men like Carney.

“I’m happy to be retired,” he said. “Some people are mad, some people are going to miss playing football. I’ve been hit and knocked around a lot and had three major surgeries. I like relaxing. But I don’t just sit on my couch and eat all day. Now I work out a lot, like five days a week.”

In addition to working out constantly, Carney has also picked up the game of golf. I observed him on the course and can say with all honesty that his talents in football have carried over to golf. With my own two eyes I saw him hit a ball at a 45-degree angle away from him and directly into the woods. Never have I been so impressed with someone’s ability to defy the laws of physics. After the round, he was kind enough to buy a round of drinks to quench the thirst of those who had played alongside him. It was a banner day for a banner individual.

As graduation looms in the near distance, the time for Carney to leave his mark on Wesleyan is drawing nigh. I asked him to examine his legacy at Wesleyan.

“I wouldn’t say that I have a legacy,” he stated humbly. “The two previous quarterbacks here were known as good guys, exceptional people; guys who were liked around campus by everyone. I hope that I continued their legacy and become an all-around good guy on campus.”

To see if he succeeded in his quest for a campus-wide likeability, I polled a few random people that I happened to pass by.

“I think he should have thrown me the ball more,” said disgruntled wide receiver Gwe Crawford ’04.

“I don’t really know him that well,” said Kingsley Choi ’05.

Clearly Carney has influenced the lives of everyone on this campus. Never has there been a sports star at Wesleyan who has so easily and effortlessly become a cultural icon. In a world that needs role models, young children and adults alike need to look no further than Carney.

With everything that he has accomplished over the past four years, it would be easy to assume that Carney will move on to bigger and better things after graduation. What’s next for this larger than life star? Curing cancer? Eliminating the nation’s debt? Acting in a major motion picture with Hillary Duff, Lindsay Lohan, and the Olsen Twins? Surprisingly, Carney wants to give back to the community that has given him so much.

“I’m ready for graduation and moving on,” he said. “Next year, I’m going to go to grad school where I hope to get a teaching degree. I’m ready to have a real job and make some money.”

Who knows what the future holds for Brennan Carney. Coming from such a famed and storied past, settling down will not be easy for this ex-quarterback. Will he be able to remain happy as a modest schoolteacher knowing that at one point in his life he was the NESCAC Player of the Week on more than one occasion? That is a question that only time will be able to answer, but I’ve got a pretty solid hunch that Wesleyan will be reaping the benefits of Brennan Carney for a long time to come.

  • ogcp

    yea right i no him

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