Gossip Girl (September 13): Enjoy a season filled with the same nonsense that occurred in the first three seasons! For those who find this show a “guilty pleasure”, feel free to come out of hiding and admit it. We’ll only laugh for a bit. P.S. OMG BLAIR AND CHUCK.

HIMYM (September 20): Will we find out who the mother is? Will Marshall and Lily have a baby? Will Barney ever get tested for an STD? Why does Josh Radnor become Bob Saget? Tune in to this show created by Wesleyan alumni Carter Bays ‘97 and Craig Thomas ’97.

House (September 20): When will the cast of House realize that he’s always right? Look forward to a new Cuddy/House relationship. Couse? Huddy? Neither really works, but tune in to watch House take a whole lot of Vicodin.

Dancing with the Stars (September 20): Either Hollywood is running out of stars, or this show is running out of funding. Whatever the case, this year’s collection of “stars” range from Bristol Palin (clinging to the coattails of her mother’s political celebrity) to Mike “the Situation” Sorrentino (whose only claim to fame is removing his shirt). To give the show some credit, they were able to get a few real stars (Brandy!); however, they also got Michael Bolton.

Glee (September 21): We may be in college now, but if you feel the strong need to relive your high school years via kids older than us playing kids younger than us who randomly break into song to explain their feelings then you’ve found the right show. Brace yourselves for more angst in one episode than you experienced in an entire year.

Modern Family (September 22): All in all a great show, Modern Family is a way of saying, “Screw you” to the nuclear family. This show is heartwarming, realistic and best of all hilarious, with jokes that are mostly directed at the craziness that is parenting. To quote this season’s premiere, “Yesterday they were babies, now they’re driving, and soon we’ll all be dead!” Look forward to more crazy antics that display just how different families can be.

30 Rock (September 23): With an all new live episode (what if the actors mess up?) and returning guest stars Matt Damon and Elizabeth Banks, 30 Rock is attempting to live up to the high standard it has set for itself in previous seasons. Will Tina Fey continue to be one of the best women in comedy? Can Alec Baldwin’s multiple-award-winning performance as Jack Donaghy keep up the biting comments? And let’s not forget recurring character Dot Com, cook and driver to a star, the future every Wesleyan theater major hopes for!

My Generation (September 23): Just what us college kids need. A show that reveals to us where our high school classmates and we will be in 6-9 years. Using a documentary style similar to The Office, My Generation contains all of the high school stereotypes we know and love, but now we get to see them as their lives turn to crap. Look forward to teenage angst coming from 28 year old men and women.